Tuesday, April 22, 2014

I searched for "PED" in this David Ortiz article.

This is what I found:

"Undoubtedly, Ortiz's legacy jumped to a different level last year."

Sunday, April 20, 2014

So you're the "Big G."

... and there is really no reason to think you'd have anything more than a moderately successful major league career if you hadn't taken steroids.

... and you've re-branded yourself as a positive clubhouse influence.

... and you're apparently going straight a major-league manager job when you retire.

... and you were never suspended, not even for a single game.

... and, as Alex Rodriguez pays for your sins, I'm wondering why you would even be allowed have a job in the major leagues.

Don't say Alex Rodriguez.

Can Mike Lupica go an entire week without mentioning ARod?:

"You know the best thing to ever happen to Ryan Braun, like in his whole life?"

Like, don't say, like, Alex Rodriguez.

"Alex Rodriguez."


That's all you have to say on the matter? A missed learning opportunity. Maybe you could have explored the injustice of double standards and the media's role in fostering animus and infiltrating the legal process.

Saturday, April 19, 2014

I love the Yankees' increased use of the defensive shifts ...

... and the defensive shifts surely seem to be effective.

Last night, Suzyn Waldman pointed out that the pitcher needs to throw the ball in the right place in order to properly execute the strategy.

I understand what she is trying to say.

She's trying to say that a hitter can easily punch an outside pitch through the hole ... assuming that's what the hitter is inclined to attempt.

Having said that, the notion that a pitcher needs to execute his pitches in order to be effective?


That's kind of known as "pitching."

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

J.R. Murphy

Girardi will call him Murphy-ey:

"Though Murphy had been referred to as 'J.R' for about five years, he actually goes by 'John Ryan,' he told Dan Pfeiffer of bronxpinstripes.com. 'I've always been John Ryan to my family,' he said. 'It was only a baseball thing that they shortened my name to J.R.' "

Monday, April 14, 2014

I must concede, Jeter's playing time is a topic people want to talk about.

Girardi is going to rest an elderly, injured player. That's not really a topic for discussion. I think the Yankee attendance is going to go way down next year, and the Yankees already know this.

Sunday, April 13, 2014

Girardi rests Jeter.

Found someone who mentioned it.

But was Girardi really catching flak?

Baseball players not playing for the 2014 Yankees.

"This was about 11 o’clock on Saturday morning before a Red Sox-Yankees game, second Saturday of the season, and Joe Girardi wasn’t just explaining why Derek Jeter wasn’t in his starting lineup — maybe you missed it, but Jeter’s retiring at the end of the season — Girardi was also showing you why it is so easy to root for him, and how well he does handling a job as big as there is in sports."

I sure hope ths is a mindblowing quote from Girardi.

“ 'I have to manage (Jeter) with a focus of winning games and keeping him healthy, not being a farewell tour,' Girardi said. 'I wasn’t hired to put on a farewell tour.' "

Yes, Jeter is old.

"Right there, before Hiroki Kuroda threw the first pitch on Saturday afternoon or a run was scored, ..."

On account of it being about 11 o'clock in the morning and the game started about 1 o'clock in the afternoon.

" ... Girardi had given you the money quote of the day, and the headline."

Jesus, you really don't even bother watching the games, do you?

McCann's two HRs didn't surpass that quote as the headline?

"But Girardi, who wasn’t being pressed on his decision or braced in the interview room, talked about that decision as if he wasn’t just playing to those of us sitting across from him in the interview area across from the Yankee clubhouse, but playing to the bleachers as well."

Well, gee.

A manager was using the press to communicate with the fans.

Maybe if Girardi kisses Lupica's butt just enough, Lupica will write a nice article.

"So Jeter was a story on Saturday because he wouldn’t be starting a day game after a night game."

Was Jeter a story? Was this a headline? Was this a money quote?

I haven't seen mention of these things anywhere else.

It's also not the first time this season that Jeter has been rested.

"But the more intriguing absent player for the Yankees is the one — Cano — who will be missing all the games this season, and next season, and the eight after that because he is playing for the Mariners. The Yankees try to beat the Red Sox and everybody else now without their best hitter and one of the best in the game."

Errr ... nice transition.

If you wanted to write an article about Cano, why didn't you just write an article about Cano?

"The Yankees lose Jeter next season. But now they’ve lost Cano forever, because of a business decision so clearly informed by what the end of Alex Rodriguez’s 10-year contract looks like, and the disaster it has become for them, and not just financially, even with Rodriguez off the books this season because of his drug suspension.

Once Jeter stood there at shortstop at Yankee Stadium and had Rodriguez, when he could still play and still hit, on his right and Cano, with his own immense talent for baseball, on his left. Both gone from Yankee Stadium. Rodriguez’s locker, no name plate on it, is next to Jacoby Ellsbury’s now. Cano’s locker, to Jeter’s right, near the entrance to the showers, belongs to Carlos Beltran, whose job it is to supply runs and danger in the middle of the lineup the way Cano did for a long time."

Thanks for the informative update regarding the layout of the Yankee locker room.

Guess what, everybody? Beltran's locker is near the entrance to the showers.

I don't get it. Are you trying to convince us that you were inside the Yankee locker room? We believe you.

The rest of the information provided is very old news. Jeter's retiring, Cano's gone, ARod is supspended, Beltran and Ellsbury have joined the Yankees.

"Still: Taking Cano out of the lineup is like taking a Cabrera away, or a Mike Trout, or a Papi Ortiz."

If Papi is on steroids, that is.

Yes, we are in total agreement. The Yankees lost their best hitter. That was in December. This is April.

"You have to know the deal with managers and coaches, whether they’ve got long-term contracts or not: They want to do everything in their power to make sure the farewell tour isn’t their own."

Money quote, Lupica! Money quote!

So your point is ... well, I'm not sure. It sure took a long time to get there.

Jeter is old, and Jeter no long plays with Cano or ARod, whose lockers no longer house their clothes, since they're no longer on the team, so why would their clothes be in that locker if they're no longer on the team? The manager of the Yankees will have to manage the players on the team instead of managing the players who used to be on the team, and some of the current players are old, and all of the current players are inferior to Cano, who is no longer on the team. and whose locker is now occupied by Ellsbury ... I mean, Beltran ... wait, who got Cano's old locker?

In summary, Alex Rodriguez.

"Oh, I get it:

Now Alex Rodriguez just wants to be left alone."

Yes, why won't your newspaper just leave him alone?

Or can you at least write something interesting about him?

In the last week or so, I've read a lot about ARod doing nothing.

Good investigative reporting about the empty nameplate on his locker. Almost as good as the article about how ARod was not going to be a MLB TV analyst.

Saturday, April 12, 2014

Answering a question nobody was asking.

Unless someone was asking whether or not Alex Rodriguez would make a good TV baseball analyst.

I knew that while ARod was under suspension that the one-trick-pony so-called sportswriters at the Daily News would stretch the story past its breaking point.

In order to keep their ARod quota, they're just make stuff up out of thin air.

Wednesday, April 09, 2014

Nova isn't a big mystery.

"Five years into the Ivan Nova experiment, the Yankees still have no idea what to expect whenever the big fellow climbs a mound.

The maddening version of Nova showed up again at Yankee Stadium on Tuesday, when the Yankees lost a very ugly one, 14-5, to the Orioles. His pitches strayed way up in the strike zone, he was hammered by virtually every Baltimore batter and soon enough Nova was walking off the mound to a cascade of jeers, having given up 10 hits and seven runs in 3.2 innings."

He's a good pitcher, not a great pitcher.

He's a good pitcher who had a lousy game.

Besides, I thought it was Jeter's fault.

"Maybe he could have been a bit luckier. There was a moment in the first inning, a potential double-play grounder, when Derek Jeter might have rescued Nova. Instead, Jeter looked every bit his 39 years going to his left and the ball scooted under the shortstop’s glove."


Jeter's lack of range is a thing now.

"In the first inning, after Nick Markakis had led off the game with a single to center field, the Orioles’ designated hitter, Delmon Young, hit a ground ball toward the shortstop side of second base. After a slow couple of steps, Jeter lunged but could not snag the grounder, which went into center for a single. A shortstop with better range than Jeter’s — he is rated near the bottom in most defensive metrics — could have turned that grounder into a double play, or at least a forceout."

It's going viral.

It's a meme.

Gee, this has been a Felz meme for 19 years. This was a Felz meme before Felz even heard of memes.

What next?

Are people going to notice that Gardner strikes out too often?

Tuesday, April 08, 2014

Jeter posing for his statue again.

"There was no pomp or pageantry at the Yankees' second home game of the season Tuesday. Nor much performance, either. A day after the fun of Derek Jeter's final home opener and a Core Four reunion, the Yanks fell flat against Baltimore in an ugly 14-5 loss in which they surrendered 20 hits.

Ivan Nova couldn't get out of the fourth inning and Jeter couldn't get to a ground ball up the middle in the first inning that might've saved the Yankees some headaches."

The Yankees lost 14-5 and Jeter hasn't had range to his left in the past 19 years.

"With an older infield of Jeter at short and Brian Roberts at second, infield range was one of the Yankee concerns entering the season."


Still, the Yankees lost 14-5 and Jeter hasn't had range to his left in the past 19 years.

So the Daily News has identified infield range as a Yankee concern ... and Jeter misses a ground ball in a game that the Yankees lose 14-5.

I suppose if you 're predisposed to look for something, you're bound to find it.

Slag on Teixeira all you want.

Few would disagree that Teixeira should bat lower in the lineup.

I just question the timeliness of this article, what with Teixeira being on the DL and all. It's kind of like explaining why Raul Ibanez should be dropped in the order.

Pondering the definition of "justice" a couple of days after the completion of a series in which Melky Cabrera hit three HRs against the Yankees.

Kiss the ring of Bud Selig, get a smaller suspension. Extortion in the pursuit of justice.

Sunday, April 06, 2014

Alex Rodriguez story.

I had a feeling the Daily News crack staff would find itself twiddling its thumbs. You know, baseball season has started.

Tuesday, April 01, 2014

Alex, I'll take "things a hack sportswriter might say" for $1,000.

Actual summary to Mike Lupica's Mets' game story. Makes me wonder if "they" will find Amelia Earhart before Lupica finds a funny punchline:

"Carlos Torres and Scott Rice had come out of the bullpen behind Gee in the seventh and made you wish Mayor Bill de Blasio, who’d thrown out the first pitch, could come back in to pitch; both making you wonder if they find Jimmy Hoffa on this day before he found the strike zone."

I like how Jimmy Hoffa is still his go-to "missing object" reference.

Oh, and he opens and closes with the Bill de Blasio joke. Because that joke is that damn good. But he explains that de Blasio had thrown out the first pitch, just in case you didn't get the subtle, subversive genius of the joke.

Sunday, March 30, 2014

Nunez sent to minors.

Can't say the press didn't see it coming.

Gee, Mike Lupica is rooting against Jacoby Ellsbury.

While specifically dismissing the potential health concerns of Jonathan Niese and Grady Sizemore, he's predicting doom for Ellsbury. Because Lupica knows the future health of humans. I guess he knows because he's God.

A deity would probably understand the difference between pre-free agency deals and free agency deals:

"If you’re keeping score at home, the Angels keep 22-year-old Mike Trout on essentially the same deal that the Yankees had to give 30-year-old Jacoby Ellsbury."

And half of what Seattle paid for Cano and 40% of what the Tigers paid for Cabrera. More or less, numbers don't matter, anyway, when we round off to the nearest 1/2-billion.

Before you discuss MLB contracts, google "free agency" and maybe you can figure out how this works. It's basic stuff.