It's a good idea.

Pretend it wasn't Scott Boras's idea:

"He would open the weekend on a Friday night with a televised gala announcing the MVP, Cy Young, Rookie of the Year and Manager of the Year awards, and have the five top candidates for each in attendance.

Hall of Fame voting would be announced Saturday, with the opener that night and Game 2 on Sunday night. After that, the Series would pick up the 2-3-2 format that's been used since 1925 (except for 1943 and 1945, when there were wartime travel restrictions). If the scheduled host club for the opener won the pennant, the Series could become a 3-4-2.

Cities would bid far in advance for the right to host the first two games, and baseball would solicit corporate money, trying to create an event similar to the Super Bowl, Final Four and BCS Championship. Figure on hotels with flowing hospitality suites, ballparks surrounded by champagne-and-caviar-filled tents and tarmacs cluttered with private jets."

It's only two more games:

"Nine games? It's too long," said New York Yankees captain Derek Jeter, the owner of four World Series rings.

It is only two more games.


"Obviously generating revenue is what this is all about anymore, which is sad, but again, you have to find ways to make it work," Yankees manager Joe Torre said.

Yes, it's so sad that major league baseball generates so much revenue.

This criticism from a man who is paid $7 million to sit on a bench while his team fights for fourth place in the AL East.

Barry Bargain.

John Donovan's list of overpaid MLB players includes J.D. Drew with the following explanation:

"June (an .898 OPS) is going a lot better than May (.552 OPS), but Drew still has a lot of convincing to do to make that five-year, $70 million deal look savvy."

OPS.

You like OPS, do you?

I like it, too.

On-base percentage + slugging percentage.

You know who leads the NL in OPS? Barry Bonds. Who you just claimed is overpaid:

"His major contribution to this team, right now, is walking to first base. Opponents, even with Bonds striking out more than he has in years and hitting just three homers in his past 96 plate appearances, are still giving him the free pass. Why? Because no one else on this team can hit."

Barry Bonds has more walks than any player in the entire history of major league baseball ever.

His on-base percentage for the 2007 season is .504 and his career on-base percentage is .444.

He is also by far the biggest draw in San Francisco. Which matters quite a bit when determining whether the investment is worth it.

By the way, Bobby Abreu is paid as much money as Barry Bonds. Abreu's OPS is .704.

Parallel lines on a slow decline.

It is odd to me how bloggers sometimes seem to exist in a parallel universe when compared to the beat writers / mainstream media.

Every Yankee fan I know was flabbergasted as Mariano sat on his hands while Proctor walked in the winning run. I didn't see any of the regular beat writers question Torre's managerial wisdom (though, admittedly, I didn't search too long).

(Update: Lisa Kennelly was on the case.)

No question which team Jay Jaffe plays for:

"I don't like to lose perspective about one game -- I'm usually the one counseling friends and readers to crawl off the ledge -- but this one was emblematic. If Torre couldn't be bothered to use a rested Mariano Rivera in the face of a sudden-death bottom of the ninth to thwart a potential three-game losing streak and 1-6 slide, then this team, this season, maybe even this regime is beyond redemption. Torre inexplicably chose to pitch Scott Proctor in that situation, and despite a terrific play to snare a pop-up bunt, Proctor walked two men, including Ramon Hernandez to force the winning run home with the bases loaded. That came moments after a wild pitch/near-HBP which should have done the job one way or the other.

Not calling Rivera's number was an indefensible decision, even moreso because Torre's made the same mistake before. Absent a note from the doctor or a visibly detached limb, there's no reason Rivera shouldn't have been in the game -- he hadn't pitched since Friday, so Torre's explanation about the length of Mo's previous outing doesn't wash. The man's thrown 1.2 innings, 20 pitches, in the past nine days! If the team is disguising a Rivera injury, what's the point?"

My open letter to Brian Cashman.

As soon as Huff's ball cleared the left-field wall, I received an angry voicemail asking me to properly articulate the universal feelings of disgust in an open letter to Torre, Cashman, Steinbrenner, and everybody else who is responsible for this mess.

I'm not sure if I can do this.

Rather than an emotional ranting, how about a short-but-deadly ninja attack?:

"Dear Brian,

Randy Johnson and Gary Sheffield are currently playing for first-place teams.

Keep up the good work.

Your friend,
Darren"

I hope that "sates the vox populi."

I'm very happy that Mariano was saved for tonight's game.

At the very latest, Mariano should have been brought in when Proctor put two men on last night. The Yankees might have lost the game, anyway. But when Torre left Proctor in, he may as well as forfeited the game. Pull the team off the field if you're going to give up.

Tonight, Mariano is pitching in a meaningless eighth inning with his team down by four runs.

Kyle Who?

Jon Heyman seems to have a grasp on the inner workings of the Yankee clubhouse:

"Kyle Farnsworth, who's done almost nothing right except shame Roger Clemens into showing up when he isn't pitching, simply has to go."

When asked to comment on Kyle Farnsworth's influence on his behavior, Roger Clemens, winner of 349 games and 7 Cy Youngs, replied, "Who?"

Breaking News: Yankees Bad.

The Yankees are a game under .500 as the midpoint of the season nears.

The Yankees are in third place in the AL East, 11.5 games back of the Red Sox, and only 3 games up on the Devil Rays. I can't remember the last time the Yankees were closer to first place than they were to last place -- mid-April?

The Yankees are in sixth place in the AL Wild Card race, 6.5 games back of the Indians.

After yesterday's loss, Kay and Flaherty seemed shocked and befuddled that the Yankees followed up an 11-1 streak with a 1-5 slump. But that is exactly what .500 teams do.

Then I read the Daily News and the Post and they basically say the same thing.

Maybe they all figured the Yankees had "righted the ship" because they had a nice winning streak that supposedly put them "back in the race," though it never put them back in the race, at least not the AL East race.

Now imagine what is going to happen when Posada's batting average falls under .340 and Rodriguez's ninth-inning batting average slumps to a mere .500.

True Yankee.

Did everybody see Roger Clemens warming up in the bullpen yesterday? I hope everybody saw this. Because lots of people made a big deal about Clemens's contract clause.

By warming up in the bullpen yesterday, Roger Clemens singlehandedly saved civilization as we know it.

Anthony McCarron actually believes Clemens was getting prepared to pitch:

"Had Roger Clemens had more time to warm up, he would've pitched yesterday in relief in the Yankees' lengthy loss to the Giants.

Clemens headed to the bullpen while the Bombers were batting in the 13th inning and began to get loose. Joe Torre said Clemens' regular throw day in between starts is today, but the Rocket told Torre he was available yesterday, if needed.

But with two out and a runner at first and the pitcher's spot due up, Clemens would've had to get warm quickly and likely wouldn't have had enough time if potential pinch-hitter Chris Basak made the final out of the inning. 'The way the inning was going, I wasn't going to rush him to get ready,' Torre said. Scott Proctor, who hit for himself, struck out looking and remained in the game, ultimately giving up the game-winning hit.

Torre said he was holding out Mariano Rivera to pitch if the Yankees took the lead."

I thought the entire warmup was a ruse. Torre was trying to trick the Giants into thinking that Clemens was going to pitch and, therefore, Proctor was coming out for a pinch-hitter. The only reason you'd do this is so the Giants wouldn't intentionally walk Posada. Who ended up walking, anyway.

Right? Right???

I hope that thinking isn't too advanced for Torre because it's the only possible reason I could come up with.

I hope the entire warmup was a ruse.

If it wasn't a ruse, then Torre once again demonstrated an inability to look ahead two or three batters. Forget about two or three innings. Forget about two or three days.

The lineup is written on a big white sheet and taped to the dugout wall. Or you can get a laptop and go online and find your team's lineup. Or you can ask a coach. Or you can peek your head out of the dugout and ask one of the fans.

Torre: "Ten-your-old kid with the cotton candy: Who's up fourth this inning?"
Ten-year-old kid with the cotton candy: "Proctor, because of the double-switch."
Torre: "Double-what?"

Please tell me I'm right.

Please don't tell me that Clemens would have pitched in that game and Proctor would have been pinch hit for except for the fact that Clemens didn't have enough time to warm up.

What can it possibly mean to say that Clemens needed more time to warm up?

You can warm up anytime you want. You can warm up between innings. You don't even need a glove. You don't even need a catcher. Just grab a ball and throw it against the wall for about five minutes.

Torre seems to have been caught off guard by his own managerial moves.

In fact, the only manager that Torre can outsmart is himself.

Oh, there's enough blame and shame to go around.

"Was this 'campaigning' obnoxious and over the top? You bet. Over the top and hilarious."

You don't get out much.

"Predictably, Kay, the voice of Al Yankzeera, said the Yankees would never engage in such foolishness."

Because they wouldn't.

"Of course they wouldn't. Kay is a cog in the Yankees' marketing machine. He knows the Bombers attract an audience satisfied only with world championships. The Yankees sell history, tradition, monuments, and retired numbers.

As for the Mets, well, Mr.Met, some anonymous dude wearing a gigantic baseball head, is as big a Mets icon as Mr. Tom Seaver and Mr. Casey Stengel. The Mets have always sold fun."

Mr. Met is not fun.

Mr. Met is not as big a Mets icon as Tom Seaver.

No Mets fan in the history of the Mets went to Shea Stadium in the hopes of seeing Mr. Met.

Or even the thrilling apple in the top hat.


But you know the most shameful aspect of this whole shameful episode?

This supposed all star only has 20 runs batted in.

I thought it was a misprint.

He's also hitting .194 with RISP and two outs.

Kayakers in McCovey Cove ready for this matchup.

"Myers ready for Bonds

Lefty specialist Mike Myers knows he can expect to face Barry Bonds as many as three times this weekend. Torre even said as much.

Myers has faced Bonds 25 times in his 13-year career, and if the results aren't spectacular (.320 average, eight walks), they are better than many pitchers can claim against Bonds. The Giants slugger has just one homer off Myers."

8-for-25 with 8 walks.

.320 BA and a .485 OB%.

But only one homerun.

Actorspeak.

I can't imagine it's really that difficult to portray Yogi "MeeHee For YooHoo" Berra.

Joe Grifasi manages to make the experience sound somewhat bizarre and disgusting:

" 'As an actor playing Yogi, you have to remember there aren't too many moving parts,' he said. 'The ones that are there are important.' "

Embarrassing.

"Announcement after announcement reminded the crowd that Lo Duca was trailing the Dodgers' Russell Martin by nearly 124,000 votes. This, Mets fans were to learn throughout the evening, was unacceptable.

So the 'Elect Lo Duca' campaign went into overdrive. The announcements kept coming, sometimes two and three times an inning, with one exhorting fans to vote five times each."

Imagine what Wallace Matthews is going to say about Tom Glavine.

By the way, Clemens only gave up two runs. I think this is the type of performance every Yankee fan was expecting:

"This is not what the Yankees were buying when they 'lured' Clemens out of a retirement he never really wanted. They thought they were buying the Rocket, a once-every-five-days performer who could lead them out of the abyss they had fallen into. He couldn't be just good, he needed to be great, and not just most of the time, but every time out.

But he is no longer that pitcher, no longer that man. In his dotage, the Rocket has become the bottle rocket, capable of the occasional 90-plus fastball - he hit 92 once in the first inning - but mostly living in Mike Mussina territory, high-to-mid 80s and nothing, I mean nothing, over the inside half of the plate.

Can this possibly be the same man who reduced the Mets to jelly in the 2000 World Series, who sawed off Mike Piazza's bat and threw the barrel at him?

Friday night, Clemens was undone by the smallest, slimmest, sleekest Mets, by Jose Reyes and Carlos Gomez, a couple of kids who rang his doorbell and ran. Between them, Reyes and Gomez combined for five hits, four stolen bases and both runs. Gomez bunted twice for hits on Clemens, and not once was he brushed back, not once was he made to feel that he had offended the new sheriff.

Gomez humiliated Clemens, as did Reyes, who twice lined Clemens' only real out pitch, the splitter, for singles, and then rubbed salt in it by crashing a first-pitch hanging curve off the upper deck in right.

And on the bases, he and Gomez mugged Clemens. In the third inning alone, Gomez stole second, leading to Reyes' RBI single. Then, Reyes stole second and third, only to be stranded by the second of Carlos Delgado's four strikeouts. The only time either of them tasted dirt was on their headfirst slides."

Clemens was "humiliated"?

So, basically, Matthews was going to write an anti-Clemens article no matter how Clemens pitched.

Abreu is a patch on ARod's butt.

I know that ARod has hit better when Abreu has batted third. I also know, obviously, that every player in a lineup is helped by other players in the lineup. For instance, ARod's BA with RISP wouldn't matter too much if the Rs were never ISP.

But let's all get a grip.

Alex Rodriguez does not need Bobby Abreu.

Alex Rodriguez had two MVPs and 450 homeruns before he ever met Bobby Abreu.

The Yankees' best pitcher so far ...

... despite the results of the dubious YES Network poll.

Pettitte has been better than I expected him to be. Not that my expectations mean a damned thing.

But, again, why are the Yankees so freely allowed to disrespect the Houston Astros thusly?:

"I talked to Andy during the summer," Torre said after Pettitte went eight innings as the Yankees beat the Diamondbacks, 7-1, for their ninth win in a row. "I think the biggest part of it was it had become work for him. Not necessarily the physical part, but it just wasn't as much fun."

Pettitte played with the Astros for three seasons. He got three playoff races and one World Series. He was paid $30 million. He got to pick up his kids at the Deer Park Middle School and play for an owner who worships God more regularly than George Steinbrenner worships God.

How awful it must have been.

By the end of the day, I've got to review and email about 100 RTFs to the product manager. I will be paid less than $30 million.

Wanna switch?

I strike out too often.

I also lead the league the majors in homeruns, runs batted in, and runs scored.

I am batting .324 with RISP, .424 with RISP and two outs, and .571 with the bases loaded.

If I project my stats for the entire season, I am on pace for ... well ... it's a lot. I don't want to calculate the numbers. I'll use a metahpor instead.

Think of David Wright, the all star baseman for the Mets who, not too long ago, was often being compared favorably to me. Are you thinking of David Wright? Do you have a mental picture in your head?

Okay: Double that.

So get better relief pitchers.

Rather than dissect Wallace Matthews's idiocy point by point, just read the article with an understanding of the difference between coincidence and correlation.

The recent Yankee Championship teams were not built on small ball. Even if they were, they'd have been even better with ARod at 3b instead of Brosius, Boggs, and C. Hayes. Less flavaful without C. Hayes, but better.

Oddly, Wallace Matthews seems to think that ARod's $16M is the reason the Yankees have a poor bullpen:

"And surely for every Rodriguez, there are dozens of Mike Stantons and Jeff Nelsons and David Weatherses out there. What the Yankees need to do now is take the money they will save on A-Rod and go find them."

Dozens? Try hundreds.

The Yankees, by the way, have already "found them." Farnsworth, Gordon, Dotel, Osuna, Hammond, Acevedo, Benitez, Nelson II, and don't forget Mendoza II, whose one inning probably didn't justify the salary.

Middle men in the bullpen are plentiful and inexpensive for a reason: They're not reliable. If they were reliable, then they'd be closers or starters.


What is likely going to occur is that ARod will opt out (if it's not worth discussing, then why are we discussing it?) and go play for Anaheim and pad his stats against Scott Proctor and the rest of the Yankees' revamped bullpen.

I've got an even better strategy: Sign ARod and, at the same time, "find" better relief pitchers.

Voila! It's a win-win and I thought of it all by myself.

Computer glitch.

This YES Network poll can't be right.

Or maybe some geek from Taiwan is the YES Network webmaster:

Poll Question: With Roger Clemens on board, who is the Yankees' top starter?

Clemens
396 Votes (10%)

Chien-Ming Wang
3424 Votes (88%)

Andy Pettitte
0 Votes (0%)

Mike Mussina
71 Votes (2%)

Pedro Martinez not cost effective.

"They have been patient with him here, and so far so good and they aren't in first place without Perez, without Maine, without Sosa. Their combined salary is around $4 million. For the old Rocket, that's what, four starts?"

I divided $4 million by Pedro Martinez's starts and I got $infinity.

Then I added up the ages of Chien-Ming Wang, Philip Hughes, Tyler Clippard, Matt DeSalvo, Jeff Karstens, Darrell Rasner, and Chase Wright and I got Tom Glavine.

The Yankees may be too old and too expensive, but the Mets sure ain't young and cheap.

Thinking too hard.

The AL MVP is presently a three-man race. Let's say one through three is Vlad, Magglio, and ARod. Fourth place may be Posada. I haven't given it too much thought.

After Posada's HUGE first-inning RBI single vs. Pittsburgh this afternoon, Suzyn Waldman proclaimed the following (and I paraphrase):

"I don't know who on the Yankees has had more big hits than Jorge Posada."

Easy. Alex Rodriguez. Three walkoff* homeruns, actually.


"If Jorge is not the MVP of the Yankees, then I don't know who is."

Easy. Alex Rodriguez.


I think there are two general reasons ARod gets so much disrespect.

The first camp is people who simply don't like him. Looking for reason to minimize his value, they come up with "clutch" and "close and late" and then look for new reasons when he hits .500 with 6 HRs in the ninth inning.

But Waldman (and John Sterling, in complete agreement, by the way) thinks that her contrarian thinking is somehow insightful. It's not insightful at all. It's dopey.

Or maybe it's just the expectations are so high that ARod's accomplishments are boring.

Expect more of it as the summer progresses. In '05, I was supposed to believe the ARod's 48 HRs and 130 RBIs were less valuable than Shawn Chacon's 79 innings. Now it's Posada "handling the pitching staff" to one of the worst ERAs in the league.

But don't trust Waldman, Sterling, or Lupica, despite their authoritative tones. If you think you know more about baseball than they do, it's because you do.


* I count the one off Papelbon, even though it was on the road.

Danger! Danger!

Nancy Armour waits until June 6th to notice the hubbub surrounding Roger Clemens:

"I don't know about anybody else, but I'm tired of Clemens' act and wish he would go away."

You don't know about anybody else? Do you own a television, radio, or a computer? Do you have access to newspapers or any other information media?


"But at what price? By giving the right-hander a deal that essentially allows him to be a part-timer - an obscenely rich one, at that - the Yankees are setting a dangerous precedent."

"Danger," as in, professional ballplayers may start getting paid a lot of money and perhaps acquire an inflated sense of self-importance?

Or "danger," as in, The End of Days?

Is somebody going to die because of Roger Clemens's contract? Will children start running with scissors and forget to look left-right-left before crossing the street?


I think a baseball player has been overpaid. By the Yankees. I wish it was the first time.

The red pill.

Remember that scene in "The Matrix" where Keanu Reeves decides to take the red pill and learn the truth?

The truth is shocking and hurtful.

The truth shattered paradigms.

The truth is that the computers had beaten humans in a big war and that humans were being harvested for their electricity. The perceived world was just, I guess, the computer-generated Matrix, or something.

Point being, it's unsettling when the foundations of your belief systems are revealed to be lies.


I think Mike Lupica experienced a similar phenomenon when Alex Rodriguez hit a game-winning two-out ninth-inning homerun off Jonathan Papelbon.

Golly, that's swell.

"A night after Lowell took a pitch off his left wrist -- one of five hit batsman in the game -- he had three hits and four RBIs. He was also involved in a little basepath payback in the fourth when he slammed his right shoulder -- and a little bit of his elbow -- into Cano in an attempt to break up a double play.

Cano bounced the ball to first as he fell to the dirt, just getting Varitek at first.

'I never had a problem with him before,' Cano said. 'Today he threw his elbow.'

But Torre said it was a clean play."

If you want to throw a few pitches at Derek Jeter or Alex Rodriguez, you go right ahead.

If you want to hit a homerun off of Scott Proctor and stand in the batter's box for seven seconds, I'll pretend not to notice.

When you beat us in the playoffs, I'll stand on the top step of the dugout and cheer for you when you raise the pennant flag.

Surprise, surprise.

Refer to David Ortiz as "Big Papi" one more time, you traitor.


ARod ought to pull one of the "Bad News Bears" moments. Steinbrenner announces that one more loss will get Torre fired. ARod fields a ground ball with two outs in the ninth and holds it while the batter runs around the bases.

That's what you get for batting me eighth in the playoffs, you blameshifting punk.

The Yankees Need Eight More Like Him.