I wonder who Mike Lupica is rooting for.

"It starts with A-Rod, who so far this season has been nothing more than a gaudy numbers-hanger and a tabloid dream."

Nothing more than a baseball player putting up gaudy numbers, when he could have been so much more.

He could have been a beacon of hope for blind orphans.

He could have been the Democrats' presumptive nominee.

He could have been my lover.


"Let's see if this is the week against the Red Sox when at least one of the games ends with a swing of his bat."

Tonight, I'm willing to bet that ARod ends the game with a swing of his mighty bat. Though it's only a 1 in 9 chance, I'm gonna roll the dice here.

Pettitte gives up 7 runs in 4 innings. Two of the runs are unearned because Jeter/Cano can't turn double plays. But they're really earned runs, technically, because the official scorer can't assume a double play, which is moronic. As John Sterling would say, that's just recordkeeping.

4 IP, 7 R, 11 H, 7 ER, 2 BB, 6 K.

Youkilis goes deep twice and Bay drives in at least three or four runs just so somebody can compare him to Manny. "Even without Manny ..." will be Michael Kay's mantra.

Then, the Yankee bullpen gets lit up. Is Chris Britton still in the bigs? Either Britton or that guy David Robertson.

Then, with the Yankees losing by 14 runs in the ninth inning, ARod grounds out to shortstop to end the game.

Thus, the game ends with a swing of ARod's bat.