I know why David Ortiz missed Kevin Gregg's face, by the way. Gregg just made his face look like a curveball.

In 1999, David Ortiz was 0-for-20 with 12 strikeouts.

I'll bet one of my toenails that David Ortiz met a li'l helper named P.E.D. sometime between his .000 performance in 1999 and his 139 RBIs in 2004:

"In the four years before A-Rod became a Yankee, including the years when he says he was juicing in Texas, he averaged just about 50 home runs a year.

Five-oh."

Five-oh, yo, five-oh!

Lights flashing behind him / But they scared of Lupica, so they mace him to blind him

"In his first four years with the Yankees, he averaged 43."

Right, and the whole time, you basically said ARod wasn't any good.

"If he hits the same 30 this year he has hit the last two, he will have averaged 31 home runs for his second four-year term with our kids from the Bronx.

Stop me if you see a trend here."

I absolutely see a trend. A hackneyed and stupid sportswriter once again endlessly praises the Red Sox and Mets while pointlessly ripping the Yankees.

Another trend is a player with 30 HRs and 100 RBIs for 13 straight season. Even better than Cody Ransom.


"All those who acted as if the earth would stop spinning properly if the Yankees didn't hit David Ortiz must have gotten giddy when they saw the highlights of Papi duking it out with Kevin Gregg of the Orioles late Friday night."

If you change "duking it out" to "swinging and missing," I thought the highlights were mildly amusing.

I also thought Gregg had a point. Ortiz is walking towards the mound when he wasn't even hit by a pitch.


But, for the most part, Yankee fans are understandably disinterested.

The Orioles baseball team is located in Baltimore and the Yankees baseball team is located in New York. The New York Daily News caters to fans of the New York Yankees, all three entities brought together due to proximity.

Yankee fans are rooting for Baltimore to beat Boston. That's because Boston in in first place and Baltimore is in fifth place.

Other than that, Yankee fans have no particular reason to be "giddy" when a Baltimore pitcher gets into an argument with a Boston DH.