Ubaldo Jimenez isn't Uber-Anything.

Uber means Big and Great and Spectacular.

The only thing Ubaldo Jimenez is Uber at is being an average major league pitcher:

"So the first name floated this season is Ubaldo Jimenez of the Colorado Rockies, a young righthander who came out of the blocks last season looking like the most unhittable pitcher anywhere."

The most unhittable pitcher anywhere?

So that's all it takes nowadays? You have a good month or two and you're something special? Call it Joba Syndrome.


"So Jimenez is the one who might be the game-changer for the Yankees, because there is supposed to be a game-changing pitcher almost every July. Whether the Yankees are in first place at the time or not."

Just randomly looking at the past 20 years. Starting in 1991. How many game-changing pitchers have the Yankees picked up in July?

David Cone.

Can you think of any others?

Denny Neagle? Cory Lidle? Esteban Loaiza? That's quite a stretch to consider them game-changers. Though Loaiza pitched pretty good in the playoffs for, you know, eight innings.

Did they get Sterling Hitchcock back one year? Yes! I looked it up! In 2001, in July, the Yankees traded Brett Jodie and Darren Blakely for Sterling Hitchcock. So there you go. Maybe Lupica thinks the Hitchcock trade Changed the Game. I know I've personally always thought that the Yankees soul has never been the same since they traded away Brett Jodie.

Actually, I thought of another one: Jeff Weaver. He was supposed to be a difference-maker. They traded Ted Lilly, who was decent.

There's a heckuva lot of turnover in the bullpen as Armando Benitez keeps the seat warm for Jeff Nelson, but that can't possibly be what Lupica is referring to.

I might be missing someone and I might be missing someone obvious. All the big names I can think of were free agent signings and or offseason deals ... Clemens I and II, Wells I and II, Key, Pettitte II ... ummm ... Kenny Rogers, Scott Sanderson, Randy Johnson, Kevin Brown, Jaret Wright, Jon Lieber, Jack McDowell ... am I forgetting about some top-line pitcher?

Sometimes, they get lucky with Aaron Small, or whatever, but that's just scrapheap stuff.

Besides David Cone and Jeff Weaver, were there any bigtime starting pitcher the Yankees picked up at the trade deadline in the past 20 years?

Because Mike Lupica just said this happens almost every July.


"Last year, and famously, the guy who was going to make all the difference in the world was Cliff Lee, who ended up going to the World Series with the Rangers and might end up doing the same this year with the Phillies. The Yankees thought they had Lee locked down and then the deal got blown up at the end."

I agree that the Yankees expected to land Lee, but Lee was never on the Yankees. I'm a little mystified by the constant calculus where the Yankees supposedly lost something that they never had.
The financial flexibility is not such a bad thing.

They are in position to pick up (gag) Ubaldo Jimenez and a DH. Though I was hoping for Jered Weaver and a DH.


"The Yankees? They have gotten by so far, and pretty well, with Scrap Heap All-Stars like Freddy Garcia and Bartolo (Christmas Miracle) Colon."

What is the Christmas Miracle joke? Does anyone understand this joke? Because I don't understand this joke.

Did Colon undergo surgery on Christmas, or something? Is this common knowledge?

Or does Lupica just think it's funny to put the word "Christmas" in front of the word "Miracle"? Like, since Lupica is skeptical of Colon's credibility, why doesn't he just call it a "Miracle" instead of a "Christmas Mircale"?


Anyway, from a baseball perspective, I think Cashman got two vets on the cheap and got a lot out of them. That's shrewd. That also leave him money to pick up Jered Weaver and a DH.


"The Yankees are 4-1/2 games ahead of the Rays for the wild card, 5 ahead of the Angels, 6½ ahead of the Tigers. Are the Yankees and Red Sox better than all of those teams? Yeah, they are. Nobody really thinks, as we move up quickly on 100 games played, that the Yankees won't make the playoffs this season."

Ummm ... okay.

Maybe you don't know what uber means and you don't know what nobody means.


"But does anybody really think they win it all with a rotation of CC Sabathia, A.J. Burnett, Hughes, Garcia and Colon? In a pitching year in baseball?"

1) In my entire life, I don't think I've ever seen a proposed five-man rotation for a playoff series.

2) Stop listing A.J. Burnett as the #2 starter.

3) Can they win it all with this rotation? Sure. I'd give them about a 15% change. Replace Colon with Zero Ring Lee and it probably would have jumped up to about 20%.

4) This rotation is instantly upgraded as soon as Aldo Nova is promoted.

5) Because they didn't spend money on Damon, Matsui, Werth, Crawford, and Lee ... now they can afford Jered Weaver and a DH.

6) A rotation of Sabathia, Weaver, Lee, and Jimenez does not guarantee a World Series title.


"Ubaldo Jimenez becomes the first name we hear this July. He probably won't be the last. Hughes is a kid. The rest of the current Yankee rotation is the 30-year-old Sabathia, the 34-year-old Burnett, the 35-year-old Garcia, the 38-year-old Colon. So far they have stood up better than younger guys with the Red Sox. We'll see about that the rest of the day.

Jimenez is 27. You can see how this makes him almost irresistible. Somebody always is at this time of year at Yankee Stadium."

Just because Lupica said the Yankees are getting Jimenez, I really think they will not.

But, yeah, the Yankee roster is not complete. Duh.


On a completely unrelated note:

"-- I don't want to make a big thing of this, because you know I'm a glass-half-full guy, but Mark Teixeira - at .240 - is hitting a snappy 43 points below his career batting average."

I actually have to give Lupica credit. He noticed that Teixeira is not that good. Giambi was considered a bust and Teixeira is considered an MVP candidate. Teixeira is basically Giambi with a glove.