Not a day goes by where Suzyn Waldman doesn't mistakenly refer to Joe Girardi as Joe Torre.

I'm starting to think she may be correct.

• When Melky Cabrera first played in the majors, he completely embarrassed himself in the outfield. That was in 2005. It's now 2009 and he has played 290 games in CF for the Yankees. Youth and inexperience are no longer excuses for turning RBI singles into two-RBI triples. Somebody hit this guy some fungoes.
• Even with the game on the line in the ninth inning, Cano did not run hard down the first base line. I mean, this is the Soriano Country Club Part II.
• Why wasn't Alex Rodriguez running in the ninth inning? I won't go into the strategic benefits of sending the runner in this situation, because that would insult your intelligence. It's possible that ARod ignored the manager's request because he couldn't get a good jump, or whatever. Which is still the manager's fault.
  
• Last week, when Melky sac bunted to the dismay of Yankee fans everywhere, we later learned that he had bunted on his own. Which is still the manager's fault. Sun Tzu would have had somebody killed.

So far, I've scanned four of the top NYC-area newspapers. I haven't found one article which rips Cano's choke job or questions Girardi's competence.

Every single Yankee fan is screaming at the TV, "Why isn't ARod running?"

None of our beat reporters have the guts or the smarts to ask the question. Go ask ARod about his charity event with Richard Gere. You're all useless.

I basically want to know if it's Girardi's fault for issuing flawed orders or if it's ARod's fault for ignoring his orders. I basically want to know which concubine should be beheaded.