"This isn't some big shot at Torre, just the facts of his situation. I have been on Joe Torre's side since Frank Cashen fired him from the Mets a million years ago."
Phew. Joe Torre can now sleep at night.
Now, when Lupica uses the phrase "a million years ago," we know he is exaggerating. But I'm forced to wonder why he seemingly presents the following as fact:
'Torre's payroll was $130 million bigger than the Marlins' was. He was nearly $70 million clear of the Red Sox."
Why lie? Lupica can make his argument without exaggerating (lying). The Yankees spend more money than other teams and this is the primary reason the Yankees win. Not just in 1998 or 2000 or the 100+ wins the past three seasons. Since they stole Babe Ruth in 1920. The Yankees haven't bought one or two titles, they've bought 26.
So one can make this argument fairly easily without lying about it.
The Yankees are not going to lap the field in 2005 by $100 million, not even close. The Yankees didn't spend $70 million more than the Red Sox last year, not even close. In Lupica World, if a lie is repeated often enough it becomes fact.
"You know, sometimes I can go a whole day without worrying myself sick over whether or not Randy Johnson is happy or not.
No kidding, I loved the way we kept getting told in the sports section last week that Johnson still had a good attitude about everything, even though that big deal with the Yankees and Diamondbacks and Dodgers had fallen through.
The guy is so brave.
Especially when he's looking to get paid again."
This attempt at sarcasm falls flat because a dork like Lupica probably can't go an entire day without wondering whether or not Derek Jeter is happy, whether or not Joe Torre is happy.
Lupica is so in love with Theo Epstein that he can never write anything flattering about Brian Cashman. If he did, it would be like cheating on his True Love.
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