Making the playoffs is a "horror show":
"The New York Yankees have lost 13 of their last 17 playoff games and basically dismissed their iconic manager because of it, and they just spent nearly $400 million to put the same product back on the field, only with potentially less pitching."
Potentially more pitching is what I think you meant to say.
"Indeed, assurance and vigor have gone the way of Mystique and Aura, capricious mistresses last seen on Curt Schilling's arm."
In all seriousness, I saw them on craigslist last night. I even sent the links to my friend Jason, who probably couldn't even afford them.
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