Insight into the ALDS.

I'll bet you didn't know why the Yankees lost in the ALDS. According to Ken Rosenthal, the Yankees lost because their pitching didn't hold up. The reason you thought differently is because Ken Rosenthal is wrong:

"Just play it out.

The Yankees’ likely Game 1 starter would have been right-hander Freddy Garcia, who shut out the Rangers for six innings on April 16, but no longer is anyone’s idea of an ace.

Left-hander CC Sabathia probably could have started Game 2 after throwing 37 pitches in 1 1/3 innings in his first career relief appearance on Thursday night. But Sabathia looked gassed in the postseason and at times down the stretch. The Yankees might have pushed him back to Game 3 in favor of — gulp — righty A.J. Burnett.

And Game 4? Righty Ivan Nova, who left the Division Series clincher with tightness in his right forearm, probably would have been done for the postseason, creating an opening for righty Phil Hughes.

The Rangers would have trashed such a collection. They won’t trash Verlander and fellow right-handers Doug Fister and Max Scherzer."

Maybe the Rangers would have pummeled the Yankees. Maybe the Rangers won't pummel the Tigers.

I know, for a fact, that the Yankees' pitching was mostly excellent in the ALDS vs. the Tigers.

A.J Burnett (gulp!) pitched pretty good. So did Freddy Garcia, even if he's no longer anybody's idea of an ace. So did Nova ... unsure if his injury is minor ... so it's unclear if he'd have been available for the imaginary ALCS vs. the Rangers that Ken Rosenthal is handicapping in his head.

"But really, what is Sabathia now?

He wasn’t the same pitcher after Girardi twice brought him back from rain delays in Seattle on July 26. In his first 24 starts, he had a 2.55 ERA and allowed seven homers in 176 2/3 innings. In his last nine starts, he had a 4.30 ERA and allowed 10 homers in 60 2/3 innings. He also turned in a rocky performance in his one true Division Series start (not the abbreviated one), allowing 13 baserunners and four runs in 5 1/3 innings."

Sabathia is one of the best pitchers in baseball.


"Don’t get me wrong — Sabathia still is a top-of-the-rotation starter, and if he gets his weight back under control, he almost certainly will be one again."

Sabathia is a top-of-the rotation starter.

If he gets his weight back under control, he will be one again.


Sabathia, is X.
If Sabathia does Y, he will be X again.


"They already are stuck with one albatross of a contract, the six years and $143 million remaining on third baseman Alex Rodriguez’s deal. First baseman Mark Teixeira, owed $112.5 million over the next five years, is showing early signs of offensive decline."

I don't know what any of this has to do with the Yankees' pitching in the ALDS, which performed quite well in the ALDS


No Yankee contract is an albatross. The Yankees make tons of money. They could release ARod if they wanted to, absorb the payroll hit, replace him with Nunez, and still win 90 games.

They missed the ALCS by one whole run.

That failure is clearly on the offense not the pitching.


The Yankees are actually stacked with young talent -- Robertson, Hughes, Nova, Joba, Gardner, Montero, Nunez.

I don't know how they will fill the roster in the future. I am too concerned, frankly, with next week's imaginary ALCS vs. Texas.

A batter who hit .191 with 3 HRs in 68 at-bats since the All Star break.

This observation is not intended to excuse ARod's performance. I'm just acknowledging the reality of the rehabbing player who batted fourth for the Yankees in the playoffs.

ARod as a Concept is a cleanup hitter.

ARod as an Actual Player in October, 2011 is not a cleanup hitter, and probably not even a starting player.

The unwillingness to acknowledge this reality possibly cost the Yankees the first round of the playoffs.

"At 'em" ball. Short for "at them" ball, in which "them" refers to the fielders on a baseball field.

"Smoltz, sensing impending doom, speculated how "talk radio" in New York would be buzzing Wednesday. As Don Kelly stepped in, Smoltz offered Burnett an escape from the mess he was in.

'Here's what he (Burnett) needs. He's tipped his hand. You don't want to tip your hand. You need an atom ball,' Smoltz said. 'And what that atom ball is you don't know where it goes - line drive, robbing a home run - you've got to get an out. You just need to get the ball over the plate and say, 'OK, I've forgotten it. The jitters are gone.'

Almost on cue, Burnett got that 'atom ball.' He grooved a pitch. Kelly lined a wicked shot to center that Curtis Granderson, after taking a step in, retreated in time to make a leaping catch to end the inning.

After that, Burnett settled in, giving up just one run, until Joe Girardi came to get him in the sixth.

Credit Smoltz with some simple but brilliant analysis.

It also marked the first time someone issued an atomic theory from a baseball broadcast booth."

Let's talk about Terry Francona some more.

Yankees are in playoffs. Yawn. Let's talk about the Red Sox instead.

Oh, we can briefly mention the Yankees:

"The Yankees seemed pretty happy to see the Rays make the playoffs this week, and we'll see how that works out if both teams make it to the American League Championship Series, right?"

Weak.

You'd say the same thing about the Red Sox Danger if the Yankees had beaten the Rays, thereby allowing the Red Sox into the playoffs.

You can say the same thing about Verlander and the Tigers, Hamilton and the Rangers, Weaver and the Angels.

The Yankees are better than the Rays.

The Yankees are the best team in the AL.

That doesn't mean the Yankees can cake walk into the World Series.


"It really will be interesting to see how it goes for Alex Rodriguez this October, since there seems to be this notion that because he had such a big October a couple of years ago, he is now in the clear forever."

Well, after two multi-page defenses of Terry Francona in which you chastised the "what have you done for me lately?" mentality, I'd be curious why the same standards are not applied to an injured all-star third baseman.

ARod's postseason OPS is .925 (not including this year's 0-for-5). He has nothing to prove.


Having said that, there are two Yankees I don't trust this postseason. One is ARod and the other is Soriano.

ARod is hurt and not ready to play.

ARod was the only Yankee starter without a hit in Game One. Which doesn't necessarily mean he won't hit two HRs tonight, but he has a mere 3 HRs and a mere 73 at-bats since the all star break.

I don't care about ARod's legacy at this point, I just think the team would be better with Chavez at 3b. ARod should be DHing at most.

Genius Sportswriter: One baseball team can beat another baseball team.

Don't blame Girardi. Blame Papelbon and Crawford:

"The New York Yankees helped drive a stake through the heart of one city Wednesday night and, in the process, applied a rejuvenating jolt to the heart of another.

By losing to the Tampa Bay Rays, they helped ensure a bleak October for the Boston Red Sox, but in helping to destroy one monster, the Yankees may well have helped to create another. Ding, dong, the Red Sox are dead, which is what a lot of Yankees fans were hoping for, and what at least one columnist that I know very well insisted was a must just a week ago."

I have no shame in admitting that I was rooting against the Red Sox. That is the essence of the rivalry. Of course, the Yankees could lost in the ALCS to the Rays. Just like they might have lost to the Red Sox.

"In one sense, the Yankees accomplished one mission over the past three days in St. Petersburg: They rid themselves of the potential menace of the Boston Red Sox for this October."

That was not the Yankees' mission.

Girardi never hid the fact that his team was going to try, within reason. A team that was tanking wouldn't have taken a 7-0 lead into the 8th inning.

"But in doing so they helped build a new menace -- one that, unlike the fading Red Sox, seems to be getting stronger and more confident."

If the Red Sox had won a one-game playoff with Tampa, then they'd be on a 3-game winning streak entering the playoffs, getting "stronger" and "more confident."

Every team that advances to the second round has at least a one-game winning streak.

The Yankees lost 13 out of 19 to the Red Sox this season.

Though every playoff team is dangerous, the Rays are the worst AL playoff team.

I'd rather play the Rays.

"Now the Yankees' best chance may lie in hoping that someone else does unto Tampa Bay what the Yankees did unto Boston."

The Yankees' best chance is beating Verlander in Game One.

What the Yankees "did unto" Boston was losing three games in a row to a third party. So that strategy won't work too well in the first round of the playoffs. The Rangers are going to help the Yankees by ... losing three in a row to Tampa?

Regular Season in Review.

Curtis Granderson easily led the league in runs, led the league in RBIs, almost led the league in HRs, and stole 25 bases.

David Robertson had 100 Ks in 67 innings and a 1.08 ERA.

What happened to David Wright? .254 and 97 Ks in 102 games. The power numbers aren't too bad, all things considered (14 HRs, 60 runs, 61 RBIs), but he now he has become a player who Ks about once per game.

High point: 9/1/2011. Burnett beats Lester, Sox leave bases loaded in ninth.

Low point: 5/16/2011. Yankees fall to 20-19 amidst Posada drama.

"Plenty" now means "one."

It was lame. Not illegal, not immoral, just lame:

"The speedy leadoff hitter had a tenuous lead in the race for his first batting title, so with the blessing of his manager, he decided to take a seat in the 162nd game of the season.

This is Jose Reyes, of course. But this is also Willie Wilson. This is 2011, of course, and it led to a firestorm that ruined what should have been a celebration of a wonderful season.

But this is also 1982, a year before Reyes was born. This was in Kansas City, where a former three-sport star at Summit High saw a chance to become the first switch hitter in 26 years to win the American League batting title.

So, on the final day of the season, Wilson took himself out of the lineup and finished the season at .3316. He sweated out a big night from Robin Yount, the future Hall of Famer who went 4-for-5 to end the year at .3307."

It was lame then and it's lame now.


"Does that make it ideal? Put it this way: It certainly would have been cooler had Reyes gone 4-for-4 and hit for the cycle in what could be his final game in a Mets uniform.

But this is an accomplishment over an entire season, not one day."

In this case, 125 games (plus one inning) is an "entire season."

"It’s unfortunate 28,816 fans didn’t get to see more from Reyes today, but they did have 125 games before that of brilliance. And, if the Mets want to guarantee their fans another five years of him at shortstop, it’s their decision to open their checkbook, not his.

'One thing I do all the time, man, is play 100 percent all the time,' said Reyes, who seemed genuinely confused at all the questions about a controversy coming his way after the game"

When I watch Reyes play, he often seems disinterested and bored.

Part of that this year was due to health, but "100 percent all the time" is just lip service.


"Another speedy leadoff hitter was in the same boat 29 years later. Turns out, in the history of baseball, Jose Reyes has plenty of company."

"Plenty of company" = Willie Wilson.


I don't think the fans care that much about the batting title. That's why they booed.

Kevin Kernan probably knew the Yankees' AAA staff would outpitch David Price tonight.

ARod is hurt.

He's not playing tonight and I doubt he'll be productive in the playoffs, if he plays at all.

This doesn't mean the Yankees are doomed:

"If A-Rod's timing doesn't come around, opposing managers will walk Cano and the clock will strike midnight on the Yankees' October."

First of all, the Cinderella metaphor is misplaced. Yankees are 98-win, $200 million, home-field-advantage favorites.


Secondly, how much baseball do you have to watch to understand that it's unpredictable? I mean, if the Yankees need a productive ARod to win, then how did they win 98 games?

Maybe Sabathia and Nova throw back-to-back shutouts.

Maybe Verlander pulls a hamstring on the second pitch of the game.


Kevin Kernan knows that Cano will be intentionally walked and ARod will make out and, because of this, the Yankees will lose in the playoffs. How does he possibly know with precision how the details of the games will unfold?

Maybe Cano walks, ARod is hit by pitch, and Teixeira hits a homerun to give the Yankees a 14-run lead.

Maybe Cano walks, ARod hits into an error, and then Teixeira hits a bloop single that scores two runs and gives the Yankees a 17-run lead.

Maybe Cano walks, the pitcher balks three times in a row, and the Yankees sweep despite ARod's .100 batting average.

Maybe Russell Martin will hit into a triple play and a Red Sox rookie catcher will hit two homeruns.

I left after one inning for the fans who paid to see me play.

You won the batting title. Congratulations. Please stop talking:

"Reyes said he told Mets manager Terry Collins 'if I go 1 for 1, take me out of the game.'

...

“A lot of people told me I shouldn’t play today. I said, ‘Oh, no. I want to play. I want to be there for the fans,' Reyes said."

Ted Williams he ain't.

Lame:

"In his only at-bat of the game, and possibly his last as a Met, shortstop Jose Reyes reached base with a bunt single to lead off the first before being replaced by pinch-runner Justin Turner. Reyes' hit put his batting average at .337 for the season, meaning that Milwaukee's Ryan Braun will have to record at least three hits against the Pirates in his evening game to snatch the NL batting title."

Incongruous.

"Sandy Alderson rewarded Collins Tuesday for keeping the Mets competitive for most of this injury-riddled season by exercising his contract option for 2013.

...

They lost to the Reds Tuesday night, 5-4, in 13 innings and are fourth in the NL East with a 76-85 record."

Is Girardi Manager of the Year?

"One swing by Jacoby Ellsbury.

That's all it took Sunday night to remind the Red Sox are still the last team they want to see in the playoffs."

I think the Yankees and their fans want to see the Red Sox eliminated simply due to the rivalry, not due to strategic analyses of potential playoff matchups.


"You can talk about the challenge of facing Justin Verlander twice in a series with the Tigers, the prospect of pitching to Josh Hamilton and the powerful Rangers or the difficulty of trying to hit against the Rays' formidable staff, but no team has handled the Yankees this season the way the Red Sox have."

The Sox are injured and flailing.

I really think that Girardi deserves a lot of credit for handling the bullpen and navigating a six-man rotation, keeping them fresh for September and October.

As for a five-game or seven-game series, you just have no way of knowing what is going to happen. The Yankees could get swept by the Rays in the ALCS ... and, of course, the Yankees might not even make the ALCS.

The best strategy is to try to win every game ... balancing health concerns once the division is clinched ... and don't bother trying to manipulate playoff matchups.

The other best strategy is to beat Verlander.


"Nobody is suggesting that Girardi has plans to tank these last two games in an attempt to help the Rays get into the playoffs, but it wouldn't be the worst idea.

With the exception of Russell (I hate the Red Sox) Martin, you won't hear anybody drawing a paycheck from the Yankees publicly express their desire to keep Boston out of the postseason."

I actually think Girardi will tank the last two games.

Sometimes, the scrubs get a win, despite the manager's best efforts. Baseball is a funny game.


"Girardi is handling this as well as he possibly can. Sending out a lineup filled with September call-ups would be bad karma, an invitation for the baseball gods to set up a Yankees-Rays ALCS that could come back and bite the Bombers.

'We don't choose opponents,' Girardi said. 'We are given opponents, and we try to beat them.' "

Mike Lupica will probably blame the Yankees somehow if the Rays win the wild card, but most sane observers know the Yankees have earned the privilege to play it any way they choose. Screwing the Red Sox is just a bonus.

Mets block Yankees from bringing minor league team to Newark. Not sure what the Mets hoped to gain.

No. Please. Stop.

Is Mariano Rivera overrated?

To put it succinctly, "no."

Professor Smith elaborates. Please don't confuse negative opinions regarding saves or negative opinions regarding closers in general with negative opinions of Mariano Rivera:

"Does that mean that Mariano Rivera is not as good as we think? No way. He's an incredible pitcher," Smith says. "Is it because he pitches the ninth inning? I don't think so.

"It's because he gets people out."

The other 74 losses, too.

"This morning, the Mets sit four games under .500 with 16 games remaining. Four against the Nationals beginning today. Then three in Atlanta and three more at St. Louis. They conclude the season with three-game sets against the Reds and Phillies. Can they go 10-6 the rest of the way? That's certainly not impossible. But 9-7 seemed a whole lot easier."

Yup, that's how it usually works.

The losses are bad for you win-loss record and the wins are good for your win-loss record.

One month later.

Wayne Coffey on Aug. 12 (not to be confused with today's 6-5 victory over the Angels):

"But make no mistake: this 6-5 victory over the Angels was not merely another fun day in the summer sun for a 71-45 team. This was a game that had to leave a ripe residue of concern, if not outright worry, no matter if anybody will admit it.

Because for the second straight time, Mariano Rivera came in and gave up a home run. For the third straight time, he came in and looked eminently hittable, even fragile."

Predictably, since this supposedly worrisome stretch of three whole games, Mariano has put up the following stats:

11 games, 11 IP, 5 hits, 1 earned run, 2 walks, 14 strikeouts, 10 saves, 0 blown saves.

Ian Kennedy has 19 wins.

You know who else is having a good year?

Melky Cabrera.

Go figure.

Beware the Tigers.

"Suddenly, with all the things we focus on around here, like the Yankees getting their rotation set for the postseason, or even the Red Sox getting healthy before October, is it time to wonder if the Tigers may be the AL's best team?

'Not a chance,' said an American League scout who has been following Detroit for much of the streak. 'I don't see them as close to the Yankees or Red Sox. They've just gotten fat lately against the Indians and White Sox, who are playing embarrassing baseball.'

With Justin Verlander at the top of the rotation, however, the scout says the Tigers are not going to be a fun matchup for any team in the ALDS."

Right.

The Yankees, Red Sox, Tigers, Rangers, and Angels will be a difficult ALDS matchup.

Somebody has to win. It might be the Yankees.

What we learned in tonight's game.

1. A.J. Burnett is clutch. I never lost faith in you, A.J.

2. Jesus Montero is not clutch, as evidenced by his lifetime .000 batting average with the bases loaded.

At last ...

... Ken Doll is out of the rotation.

Phil Hughes's Home / Away Splits.

2011: Home ERA 8.89 / Away ERA 4.00.

Career: Home ERA 5.07 / Away ERA 3.84.

Critics and cheeseburgers fuel Ortiz's production.

The adjective "historic" takes on new lows:

"Only three other players in their age-34-or-older season, standing at least 6-foot-3 and weighing at least 220 pounds, did what Ortiz did last season: hit at least .270, get on base 37-plus percent of the time and slug better than .529. If Ortiz can keep up his numbers this season – a .300 batting average, a .388 on-base percentage and a .557 slugging percentage ..."

True Grit.

I know the Mets are in 60-67 and in danger of slipping into last place, but this doesn't fully explain the victorious Mets season.

It's math, folks.

The Mets started the season 5-13 (.278), which is bad.

The Mets have only won 5 of their last 21 games (5-16, .238), which is also bad.

It's a combined 10-29, which is a .256 winning percentage for approximately 1/4 of the season.

But this ignores the games in between. The gritty games which will win the MVP for Jose Reyes and the Manager of the Year for Terry Collins.

The Mets were an unbelievable 50-38 in the rest of the games. Probably the best 88-game stretch in baseball history.

So if you just ignore the beginning of the season and the end of the season, the Mets are Amazin'.

Girardi takes it out on sportswriters.

1) I also thought the "Joe Mauer third strike" excuse was absurd.

2) I don't know why Girardi is afraid to lash out at an unpopular player:

"This was no subtle, side-of-the mouth slur. Two steps toward the dugout, Burnett turned toward Girardi as he appeared to say, 'That was [expletive] [expletive].' You better believe the manager heard it, as did the Yankee infielders who’d gathered on the mound.

Girardi kept his back turned, pretending to be unaware of the insult. When he got to the dugout, however, Girardi followed Burnett into the runway and moments later the right-hander was back on the bench.

It looked like a seminal moment for Girardi, except that he backed away from it. Instead, the manager lashed out at YES Network’s Jack Curry, responding with sarcasm after being asked about the exchange.

'This is silly. This is really, really silly,' he said. 'You know what? We had a fistfight, is what we had. Nothing happened between me and A.J.'

The manager and Burnett stuck to an absurd story they’d cooked up, claiming the blow-up was rooted in a close pitch to Joe Mauer that wasn’t called a strike. No one bought it, not even the YES announcers. Ken Singleton, following what he called the 'old-school' code of conduct, stated the obvious: Burnett showed up his manager in front of millions of viewers.

Too bad Girardi didn’t have the guts to stand up to Burnett in public. He found it easier trying to bully Curry, who stood his ground. The angrier Girardi became, the more it looked like he’d been caught in a lie."

On the other hand, maybe Girardi and Burnett are telling the truth.

Half of his 2011 productivity came on one A.J. Burnett pitch.

I'll explain in five words why the Yankees don't regret Alex Rodriguez's contract.

Nobody buys Curtis Granderson jerseys.

"Once back, Rodriguez will reclaim third base, remember how to catch a pop-up and try to avoid finishing a season with fewer than 20 home runs (he currently has 13) for the first time since he became an everyday major leaguer."

He'll have 20 HRs by the end of the month.


He'll also probably DH a lot with Chavez playing third.


Of course ARod is not worth $27.5 million per year, or whatever. Just about every veteran baseball player is overpaid.

But there is really no reason for the Yankees to regret signing him to a long-term, expensive contract. It's not as though 1996 ARod was available as an alternative.

Everyone for NL MVP.

"On Aug. 14, Atlanta Braves second baseman Dan Uggla saw his hitting streak snapped at 33 games. His dominance during the streak left him with a batting average 58 points higher than it began. At the conclusion of the streak, he was also left tied for third place in the National League home run race.

With all his success for the past month and despite having a .231 average, he could still claim the NL MVP."

Seek help, you homer.

"Before I get told to seek help or to stop being a homer, hear me out."

This had better be good.


"This has been the year of the pitcher. Pitchers like Justin Verlander, CC Sabathia, Jered Weaver and Roy Halladay have been dominating hitters on a regular basis this season. "

Three of them are in the American League.


"It's been a year that even the greatest player in the sport—Albert Pujols—has struggled more than ever before in his career (he too has come out of his slump). Outside of Prince Fielder and Matt Kemp, no other player has been more dominant than Uggla."

Well, then at least vote for the players who have been more dominant.

"With six weeks left before the end of the regular season, there is still time for Uggla to raise his average up to an acceptable .250. A higher average, coupled with high home run and RBI totals and quality defense, and Uggla could be a serious contender for the award."

Oh.

Lots of things could happen.

MVP discussion with no mention of Prince Fielder.

"A month ago Toronto's Jose Bautista was on a fast track to win the American League MVP Award. Now, runner-up is the best he can hope for. And that might be a stretch."

A month ago, Adrian Gonzalez was on a fast track to win the American League MVP Award.


"Take nothing away from Bautista, but the Red Sox are leading the toughest division in the Major Leagues and first baseman Adrian Gonzalez is a huge reason why."

Take nothing away from Bautista ... except the American League MVP Award.

"Zeroing on the AL MVP is much easier than in the NL.

There's always a debate among Baseball Writers Association of America voters as to whether the MVP should be from a winning team -- a team that makes the postseason. Many voters feel strongly that a player on a losing team, no matter how great his season, should not be MVP."

I agree this is dumb, in and of itself.

"Really, though, Braun isn't having a season equal to Reyes and the Dodgers' Matt Kemp, both playing on teams no longer in playoff contention.

Throw the 'winning team' belief out the window and give the MVP to Reyes."

That's known as a red herring: "You shouldn't exclude Reyes because he plays for a losing team." I agree that Reyes shouldn't necessarily be punished because the Mets are bad. I just happen to think that other players in the NL are having better seasons.


Fielder has not missed a game. I happen to put a lot of emphasis on games played. Fielder is .305/.417/.567, 27 HRs, 75 runs, 89 RBIs ... err, 0 stolen bases.

Reyes is .336/.377/.507 , 5 HRs, 80 runs, 37 RBIs ... 34 stolen bases.

(I abstain from similar comparisons to Kemp, Braun, Pujols, etc.).

Reyes gets credit for playing shortstop, huge debits for missing 20+ games. During those 20+ games, Reyes had essentially zero value to the Mets.

My elbow hurts just thinking about it.

"[Scott Proctor] was one of former manager Joe Torre's most trusted relievers back in 2006, when he threw 102 1/3 innings and compiled a 3.52 ERA in 83 games.

Torre also turned to Proctor plenty in 2007 before he was traded. In 54 1/3 innings (54 games), Proctor was 2-5 with a 3.81 ERA."

I'm not being hysterical. I'm not being hysterical. I'm not being hysterical. I'm pointing out the facts.

Imagine if Mariano had actually blown the save:

"It would be ridiculous to suggest the Yankees need to start shopping for a closer, or even to think that Rivera is about to turn into the relieving equivalent of Willie Mays at the end of his career. But it's not hysteria to point out the facts. Between 1997 and 2009, Rivera gave up runs in three straight outings exactly four times. He has now done it three times in the last 15 months."

Rivera is about to save 19 games in a row with an ERA of 0.00.


More to the point, what is the actionable item? There isn't one.

If Sabathia can't win in the playoffs and if Rivera can't save a game in the playoffs, then, yeah, the Yankees are probably sunk.

What are the Yankees supposed to do about it in August?

Should the Yankees fake injuries for Sabathia and Rivera so they can move Hughes into the starting rotation, make Robertson the closer, and put Brackman on the big league roster?

Problem solved.

Nobody cares. Write about the Mets.

"The Yankees scored nine runs and made it a nice, easy night for Ivan Nova, who is about twice the starting pitcher A.J. Burnett is right now."

A little late to the Nova party, but, whatever. He's just 11-4, 3.85 ERA. Starting pitcher for the Yankees. Who play in New York.

Lupica is the Last Person on Earth who thought Burnett was the Yankees' #2 starter.


"The game was also noteworthy for another reason: The Yankees got back over .500 against teams with winning records in the American League this season."

Wow.

If you add in today's win, the Yankees are two games over .500 against winning teams in the AL.

Which means the Yankees are 10 games over .500 against non-Boston winning teams in the AL.

I'm suddenly optimistic. I really didn't think the Yankees were playing that well against good teams.


"Of course these numbers from the regular season of 2011 are more than somewhat skewed because our kids are 2-10 against the Red Sox this season. Now in our company town, this really isn't supposed to matter because of two things, as far as I can tell reading and listening:

Twenty-three years ago – 23 – the Mets beat up on the Dodgers during the regular season and only lost to them once and still got beat by the Dodgers, seven games, in the National League Championship Series that year. I mention that stat a lot myself, even though I never assume because the Dodgers got hit by lightning one time that you can practically expect something like that to happen in the playoffs because it happened in '88."

You.

Are.

Lying.

Naturally, some people bring up the '88 Dodgers as the prime example of the relative meaningless of regular season records.

It's the prime example, but hardly the only example.

"Something like that" happens in the playoffs every year.


"Here's the deal: You either think these Red Sox-Yankees games matter in the regular season, or you don't. If not, lose the hype and buildup forever. If we're going to talk about The Rivalry and the history and how it's the best thing going in baseball and maybe all pro sports, then just because the story doesn't come out the way it's supposed to – that means from New York's way of thinking – means that these games are such trifles that they practically shouldn't be counted in the standings. It doesn't work that way."

When I was a youngster, I remember the guy on WPIX hyping up the weekend series with the Mariners. The awful Mariners were describes as "pesky." This was one of my first lessons in PR-speak.

Lupica seems to be complaining that the Yankee PR machine is engaging in PR.

Everyone else is hyper-worried about the Yankees. Worried about Sabathia, Mariano, the Red Sox, ARod's hip, Colon, Garcia, Burnett, etc.


"And by the way? I was never one of the people who thought that the Red Sox were going to run and hide in the AL East because they signed Adrian Gonzalez and during the regular season. The idea that those signings, the Red Sox spending for one winter the way the Yankees usually do, turned the Yankees into $200 million underdogs is as ridiculous now as it was then. I never think the Yankees are big underdogs to anybody starting the season, and that includes the Phillies after the they sign Cliff Lee."

I never thought the Yankees were underdogs, either, by the way.

But I didn't use a newspaper column to say, "I told ya so," because (a) I don't have a newspaper column, and (b) I am post-pubescent.

Mariano Rivera's Career is Over.

We've been through this nonsense before. We've been through this nonsense every year since 1997:

"If Mo goes south, the Yankees have no chance."

No chance to do what? No chance to make the playoffs? Because, while I know that nothing is settled until it's settled, the Yankees have a 6-game lead on the Angels with 48 games to play. I think they could possibly hold off the Angels even if Mariano went on the DL for two months.

"Joe Girardi’s club can live with A.J. Burnett being the Mediocre Man just trying to have fun. They can survive for a time without Alex Rodriguez and they can weather Jorge Posada’s struggles that cost him his DH job.

But if Mariano Rivera falters, the Yankees might as well call it a season. They go as Mo goes."

Oh.

That's a stupid thing to stay.


"The Great Rivera stumbled for the second straight game last night, surrendering a two-run home run to Bobby Abreu in the ninth inning. That blast to right gave the Angels a stunning 6-4 win at Yankee Stadium and handed Rivera (1-2) the loss.

For now, life for the Yankees is 'Oh, Mo!' ”

It was "stunning."

I was "stunned."

I was actually stunned that Girardi didn't walk Abreu after the count got to 3-1. I considered if a failure by Rivera, Marin, Girardi, and the architect who moved the RF fence in 50 feet to accommodate Babe Ruth.

As for Rivera's back-to-back meltdowns, they consisted of exactly one legit hit.

"Abreu’s home run, his second of the night, sent Rivera’s ERA against the Angels into orbit. His 3.60 career ERA against them is his highest against any opponent."

I'll let the stupidity and irrelevance of that observation speak for itself.


"Rivera is Yankee gold. Still, in a season of questions, the biggest question is staring the Yankees in the face: Is the Great Rivera finally showing his age?"

No.

Old School.

“ 'I let [the win] go,' said Burnett, who allowed seven runs and 13 hits in 4 1/3 innings. 'They didn’t beat me, I lost the game. I wished somebody would have grabbed me and shook me. I tried not to lose the game.'

As Burnett was giving up hit after hit, none of the infielders visited him on the hill to pat him on the back or simply give him a breather. The frustration surfaced when he slapped the ball in Joe Girardi’s hand leaving the mound and in the tunnel from the dugout, where he ripped his shirt off."

I have a vision in my head. It's Goose Gossage sitting in the dugout after a tough loss. Or Bob Gibson. Or Don Drysdale. Or Ron Guidry.

Sweat-soaked and angry, Goose sits at his locker staring into a group of reporters. From his pursed lips underneath his handlebar mustache, he explains his disappointing outing with the following words:

"None of the infielders visited him on the hill to pat me on the back or simply give me a breather."

Did you know cortisone is a steroid?

I don't get the unending "Christmas Miracle" joke and I don't understand Lupica's personal gripe with Bartolo Colon, of all people:

"If Christmas Miracle Colon makes it to the end of the season pitching at anything close to a high level, they're going to have to open another branch of that hospital in the Dominican where he got his 'stem cells.' "

First of all, you're accusing Bartolo Colon of lying and cheating. That's the clear insinuation of putting the words "stem cells" in quotation marks. So you're accusing Bartolo Colon of using human growth hormones or steroids.

I can't prove Colon didn't use steroids, but Lupica has the burden of proof.

I know that filthy liars like Lupica project their tendencies upon other people, but this is quite an accusation to make without proof.


Secondly, I thought of Colon when I heard about Lackey's cortisone shot.

Lackey sure is pitching better since his "cortisone shot," don't you think?

It's understandable that Lackey would turn to "cortisone shots," given the pressure of his contract. Lackey probably asked David Ortiz how Ortiz's career suddenly rebounded for a second time (wink, wink). Maybe Lackey uses Ortiz's "supplier" of 100% legal medicinal aids.


"The Mets may be running out of steam, but Jose Reyes sure can't if he wants to get paid, right?"

Yes, it would be terrific if the Mets overpaid for the overrated Jose Reyes.

But the Mets can't be running out of steam. The Mets are the biggest story in New York and you just said one week ago that you'd never give up on the Mets.

To quoth:

"Even if Santana does come back, it is hard to say how the Mets keep the Braves in sight. Or stay over .500. That doesn't make sense. But neither has the Mets season over the last 80 games or so. You count them out now that Beltran is gone. Count me out of the counting-out business with Collins' Mets."

Do you know what men do? Men say what they mean and mean what they say.

Your punishment for lying is mandatory attendance at every Mets game for the rest of the season. You have to ignore the first-place Yankees and write a column about every interminable, September-callup, 10-games-out-of-the-Wild-Card Mets game.


"You can trust me on this one:

You know what the guys running the Yankees must fantasize about a lot:

Getting out from under the rest of Alex Rodriguez's contract somehow.

The modern-day Yankees have signed players to a lot of dumb contracts over the years.

Never one as dumb as A-Rod's."

This weird, ongoing proclamation goes beyond typical anti-ARod/anti-Yankee bias. It's just downright illogical and easily disprovable.

My advice is, don't trust Mike Lupica on anything. The only thing he's consistent at is being Mike Lupica. Which means being a hypocrite ... or maybe an ignoramus.

Lupica proclaims no modern-day Yankee contract is worse than ARod's contract.

Just on the current 2011 Yankees (or Trenton Thunder, as the case may be): Kei Igawa, Mark Teixeira, A.J. Burnett, Derek Jeter, Rafael Soriano, Jorge Posada.

"Modern-day" Yankees could go back to Steve Kemp, but certainly would include, say, Jeff Weaver, Hideki Irabu, Carl Pavano, Javier Vazquez, Jaret Wright, Kevin Brown, Jason Giambi.

What about the Roger Clemens contract of 2007?

ARod's annual .300/30/100 is dumber than paying a 44-year-old pitcher a pro-rated salary of $28 million (?) ... which would have been the highest salary in baseball at the time ... to win 6 games and lose 6 games? To last a whole 2 1/3 innings in the playoffs?

I know the ARod contract is longer and the ARod contract is bigger, so it's appropriate to grade on a curve. But ARod earns his money and always has.

I think the "guys running the Yankees" fantasize about different things. The "guys running the Yankees" are happy to overpay for ARod, Jeter, Posada, Burnett, etc., as long as the Yankees keep winning and the merch keeps moving.

I think the "guys running the Yankees" fantasize about similarly overpaying for Cliff Lee.

4 2/3 innings.

This was the third time in about three weeks that Girardi removed his starter in the fifth inning. Girardi removed Burnett when the Yankees had a 13-7 lead. Now, we know Torre would never do it, hoping to get his starter a W. We also know that Girardi doesn't always do it.

It won't always work out.

Gonzalez might have hit a grand slam.

But keep it up, Joe.

Wild card both good and bad.

The wild card race has pretty much ruined the 2011 AL East race.

Number Two.

Just a thought: As The One Who Shall Not Be Named tries to blow a 12-run lead and continue his month-long winless streak ...

... why is he still consistently referred to as the Yankees' #2 starter?

Granderson closing in on 100 runs.

Sabathia closing in on 20 wins (knock on wood).

The Yankees sure are boring.

No storylines.

You're not allowed to write about the Yankees during the playoffs because they are too boring.

It's fun to see a liar's logical constructs collapse:

"But Monday is Aug. 1, and for now, Reyes is not just still the best player in town this season, he is the MVP of his league. He has the second highest batting average in baseball, after Adrian Gonzalez, who is the MVP for the American League so far. He has scored 78 runs, even though you know what the rest of the Mets batting order has looked like for so much of this season."

The Mets are tied for the 7th-best record in the National League (I will ignore the American League, since this discussion is about the NL MVP).

The Mets have the same record as the Pirates.

Jose Reyes has 4 HRs and 35 RBIs. (Yes, CitiField decreases HRs, but it also increases triples.)

78 runs is a lot; 23 stolen bases is a lot; Reyes gets extra credit for playing shortstop, even though he's been mostly a butcher with 12 errors already.


Consider the season that Curtis Granderson is having so far: .269/.363/.567, 28 HRs, 77 RBIs, 94 runs, 19 stolen bases.

So this is a CFer with 16 more runs scored and 42 more RBIs.

Reyes is (a lot) better in batting average and triples.

Granderson's team is (probably) going to make the playoffs.

So which player is having a better year?


The whole "team record" thing isn't my rule. It's Lupica's rule. It's a rule that applies to every MVP contest for the past 30 years, but it suddenly doesn't apply to Jose Reyes and the Mets.


"Oh, sure, there are other players with better across-the-board numbers in the National League, starting with Matt Kemp of the Los Angeles McCourts. Ryan Braun is having a big year for the Brewers, so is Prince Fielder, Ryan Howard always has the numbers with the Phillies, who still have the best record in baseball. Brian McCann of the Braves was in the conversation before he got hurt."

Oh, sure, across-the-board numbers don't interest me in MVP discussions.

Neither do team records.

Neither do injured players like McCann, with the exception of Jose Reyes, who missed three weeks.


"He has done that without hitting the ball over the wall, done that from leadoff, done that with all those multiple-hit games and all those triples, done that standing on second or third after blowing into one of those bases and smiling and clapping his hands. No one in the league has carried a team more than this."

It's probably true that Reyes has carried his team more than any other NL player. But now you're giving Reyes extra credit for playing on a bad team.


Also, this is the 700th column you've written about Jose Reyes.

The Yankees, 21 games over .500, 2 games back of the Red Sox ... they bore you that much?

The only mention of the Yankees in this three page column are (1) mocking ARod, (2) praising HOPE week, (3) an indirect knock that the Mets are the best story in New York, and (4) mocking the Yankees' chances in the playoffs vs. the Rangers.

Which makes no sense.

The Yankees are boring.

The Mets are the best story in New York.

When the Yankees are playing the Rangers in the playoffs, I want a profile of Lucas Duda. Or maybe you can caddy for the so-called NL MVP on the golf course.

But ...

"There was supposed to be no season and there was supposed to be no Mets future and somehow now, at least in the short run, they might have both."

I dispute the notion that there was "supposed to be" no Mets season this year. They have a $115 million (?) payroll and that should allow for some roster depth in the event of injuries.

As for the idea that there was "supposed to be" no Mets future, how far in the future are we talking about? The Mets are not "supposed" to play .500 ball for the next fifty years?

It's difficult to decipher Lupica's unusual use of English words and verb tenses.

The idea that, in the past, a future event was not supposed to happen ... that's very confusing. Because I don't know if today's present is the past's future or if the future in question is an indeterminate point in time even further in the future. Which would mean it "is" not supposed to happen instead of "was" not supposed to happen.

But, yeah, I get the gist. The Mets are 3 games over .500, which is impressive to a lot of people who had low expectations.


"Maybe you still aren't sure about the future part, because you think the Madoff trustee, Irving Picard, is going to eventually shut the Wilpons down like a bank foreclosing on one more house. But all of a sudden that story isn't being covered the way it was for a long time, which means like a slam dunk, excluding the New York Times, of course."

The Mets will have a lot of money. If not from the Wilpons, then from someone else. They rake it in every time Chris Carlin uncomfortably corners a barfly in "Beer Money."


"They come into Thursday afternoon's game with the Reds two games over .500, even though there have been all the times SINCE they became a real team where we have declared them legally dead in the National League and in the wildcard race. They come into Thursday afternoon's game 7 1/2 games behind the Braves in the wildcard race and if you are a Mets fan, you know how close they are to being closer than that after the Braves stole one game against the Pirates and got a walk-off win in another."

But ...

They are already dead in the NL East race.

But ...

They were never declared legally dead in the wildcard race.

But ...

7.5 games behind the Braves is a heckuva lot, but that's not the most daunting task. They're also behind the Diamondbacks, Cardinals, and Pirates.

But ...

The game where the Braves won on the bad call at home plate? The Braves might have won that game, anyway, even if the umpire had gotten the call right.

But ...

You're criticizing the Braves for a walkoff win? Walkoff wins don't count as wins?


"Because you can keep saying this, again and again and again: If somebody had told you that everything that has happened to the Mets would happen to them - and that means apart from all the Madoff drama - you would have been sure that they would be the Cubs right now, or the Orioles, or the San Diego Padres."

Wow. You set the bar kind of low there.

The Cubs are only 13 games behind the Mets ... and if the Mets hadn't swept the Reds ... and if the Mets didn't have that walkoff win against the Yankees ... and if the Cubs had won some of the games they almost won ... blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.

The Mets are just another Forced Underdog story because that's the only narrative that is palatable.

Good article for Yankee fans about Kevin Maas, Roberto Kelly, and Hensley Meulens.

Burn it down.

The Tropicana Dome has a roof which is the color of baseballs. It's pathetic and embarrassing to major league baseball, the Rays acknowledge as much, and it is about to cost the Yankees a ballgame as Granderson loses a can of corn in the 7th inning.

Mets Stats of the Day.

• Since their 5-13 start, the Mets are 42-35.
• Including their 5-13 start, the Mets are 47-48.
  
• If the Mets win all of their remaining 67 games, they will match the record of the 1998 Yankees.
  

Ubaldo Jimenez isn't Uber-Anything.

Uber means Big and Great and Spectacular.

The only thing Ubaldo Jimenez is Uber at is being an average major league pitcher:

"So the first name floated this season is Ubaldo Jimenez of the Colorado Rockies, a young righthander who came out of the blocks last season looking like the most unhittable pitcher anywhere."

The most unhittable pitcher anywhere?

So that's all it takes nowadays? You have a good month or two and you're something special? Call it Joba Syndrome.


"So Jimenez is the one who might be the game-changer for the Yankees, because there is supposed to be a game-changing pitcher almost every July. Whether the Yankees are in first place at the time or not."

Just randomly looking at the past 20 years. Starting in 1991. How many game-changing pitchers have the Yankees picked up in July?

David Cone.

Can you think of any others?

Denny Neagle? Cory Lidle? Esteban Loaiza? That's quite a stretch to consider them game-changers. Though Loaiza pitched pretty good in the playoffs for, you know, eight innings.

Did they get Sterling Hitchcock back one year? Yes! I looked it up! In 2001, in July, the Yankees traded Brett Jodie and Darren Blakely for Sterling Hitchcock. So there you go. Maybe Lupica thinks the Hitchcock trade Changed the Game. I know I've personally always thought that the Yankees soul has never been the same since they traded away Brett Jodie.

Actually, I thought of another one: Jeff Weaver. He was supposed to be a difference-maker. They traded Ted Lilly, who was decent.

There's a heckuva lot of turnover in the bullpen as Armando Benitez keeps the seat warm for Jeff Nelson, but that can't possibly be what Lupica is referring to.

I might be missing someone and I might be missing someone obvious. All the big names I can think of were free agent signings and or offseason deals ... Clemens I and II, Wells I and II, Key, Pettitte II ... ummm ... Kenny Rogers, Scott Sanderson, Randy Johnson, Kevin Brown, Jaret Wright, Jon Lieber, Jack McDowell ... am I forgetting about some top-line pitcher?

Sometimes, they get lucky with Aaron Small, or whatever, but that's just scrapheap stuff.

Besides David Cone and Jeff Weaver, were there any bigtime starting pitcher the Yankees picked up at the trade deadline in the past 20 years?

Because Mike Lupica just said this happens almost every July.


"Last year, and famously, the guy who was going to make all the difference in the world was Cliff Lee, who ended up going to the World Series with the Rangers and might end up doing the same this year with the Phillies. The Yankees thought they had Lee locked down and then the deal got blown up at the end."

I agree that the Yankees expected to land Lee, but Lee was never on the Yankees. I'm a little mystified by the constant calculus where the Yankees supposedly lost something that they never had.
The financial flexibility is not such a bad thing.

They are in position to pick up (gag) Ubaldo Jimenez and a DH. Though I was hoping for Jered Weaver and a DH.


"The Yankees? They have gotten by so far, and pretty well, with Scrap Heap All-Stars like Freddy Garcia and Bartolo (Christmas Miracle) Colon."

What is the Christmas Miracle joke? Does anyone understand this joke? Because I don't understand this joke.

Did Colon undergo surgery on Christmas, or something? Is this common knowledge?

Or does Lupica just think it's funny to put the word "Christmas" in front of the word "Miracle"? Like, since Lupica is skeptical of Colon's credibility, why doesn't he just call it a "Miracle" instead of a "Christmas Mircale"?


Anyway, from a baseball perspective, I think Cashman got two vets on the cheap and got a lot out of them. That's shrewd. That also leave him money to pick up Jered Weaver and a DH.


"The Yankees are 4-1/2 games ahead of the Rays for the wild card, 5 ahead of the Angels, 6½ ahead of the Tigers. Are the Yankees and Red Sox better than all of those teams? Yeah, they are. Nobody really thinks, as we move up quickly on 100 games played, that the Yankees won't make the playoffs this season."

Ummm ... okay.

Maybe you don't know what uber means and you don't know what nobody means.


"But does anybody really think they win it all with a rotation of CC Sabathia, A.J. Burnett, Hughes, Garcia and Colon? In a pitching year in baseball?"

1) In my entire life, I don't think I've ever seen a proposed five-man rotation for a playoff series.

2) Stop listing A.J. Burnett as the #2 starter.

3) Can they win it all with this rotation? Sure. I'd give them about a 15% change. Replace Colon with Zero Ring Lee and it probably would have jumped up to about 20%.

4) This rotation is instantly upgraded as soon as Aldo Nova is promoted.

5) Because they didn't spend money on Damon, Matsui, Werth, Crawford, and Lee ... now they can afford Jered Weaver and a DH.

6) A rotation of Sabathia, Weaver, Lee, and Jimenez does not guarantee a World Series title.


"Ubaldo Jimenez becomes the first name we hear this July. He probably won't be the last. Hughes is a kid. The rest of the current Yankee rotation is the 30-year-old Sabathia, the 34-year-old Burnett, the 35-year-old Garcia, the 38-year-old Colon. So far they have stood up better than younger guys with the Red Sox. We'll see about that the rest of the day.

Jimenez is 27. You can see how this makes him almost irresistible. Somebody always is at this time of year at Yankee Stadium."

Just because Lupica said the Yankees are getting Jimenez, I really think they will not.

But, yeah, the Yankee roster is not complete. Duh.


On a completely unrelated note:

"-- I don't want to make a big thing of this, because you know I'm a glass-half-full guy, but Mark Teixeira - at .240 - is hitting a snappy 43 points below his career batting average."

I actually have to give Lupica credit. He noticed that Teixeira is not that good. Giambi was considered a bust and Teixeira is considered an MVP candidate. Teixeira is basically Giambi with a glove.

Alex Rodriguez is old and on the DL. If he was young and on the DL, one might confuse him with Jose Reyes.

"This has been the Yankees season - and off-season before it - dominated by Derek Jeter. It started with his contentious contract negotiation, has continued all the way through 3,000 hits and through the, which he did not attend, citing exhaustion, because of the 3,000."

Years ago, I went to a movie theater and watched the first Harry Potter movie. I instantly became disinterested in all things Harry Potter.

The final Harry Potter movie is currently in theaters -- it's not called Harry Potter 8, but instead it's called Harry Potter 7, Part 2 -- and lots of people think it matters, but I don't care.


Kinda like the women's US soccer team. Don't even care enough to google the scores. Though it's nice to see Han Solo and Princess Leia's daughter doing so well.


You can choose to pay attention to what matters to you.


The Yankee season has been about a lot of things. Second place; Eighteen games over .500; 1-8 vs. Boston; A starting pitcher with 12 wins at the All Star Break; Granderson and Teixeira hitting HRs like Mantle and Maris; David Robertson; A team with an unusual combination of power and speed.

In my world, the first 88 games have not been dominated by Derek Jeter.


"A few years ago, coming out of the 2007 when Rodriguez hit 54 home runs for the Yankees, you could make a case that he was as big a baseball star as there was in the world, the way - who turns 36 at the end of this year - was still the biggest sports star in the whole wide world. Now it is the middle of the sports summer and A-Rod is out of action with a bad knee and so is Tiger Woods, who misses his second straight major because of injury, and might miss a third before the summer is over."

ARod is on the DL. Jeter just got off the DL. Wright and Reyes are on the DL. About 100 players are currently on the DL. Tiger Woods doesn't play baseball.


"The attention will shift to Jeter's right, where the third baseman will come back and move up the all-time home run list a little more. He is at 626 right now. Junior Griffey is at 630. So A-Rod will pass him at the end of August or in September. Next year he is scheduled to pass Willie Mays, who sits at 660. And he will be the next Yankee to get to 3,000 hits, either next season or the one after that."

How boring.


"Big numbers approaching for Alex Rodriguez, even as his numbers keep slipping. The Yankees are paying him big to play into his 40s, but ask yourself a question: Do you expect him to ever again carry the Yankees the way he did in the 2009 postseason?"

Sure, why not?

Edgar Renteria won the World Series MVP last year. Crippled Hideki Matsui won the World Series MVP the year before that.


"The Yankees paid him to carry the team and then, almost immediately, had to go get Mark Teixeira to help him carry the team. Think about that: They paid A-Rod upwards of $300 million to be The Man and then had to go pay Teixeira nearly $200 million to be his sideman."

This is a dig at ARod that makes no sense.

When a baseball team signs a big free agent, their game plan is not to never sign another free agent ever again. I can't really think of another instance where the Yankees stopped signing free agents.

Two players can be The Man. We'll call them The Men.


"Alex Rodriguez may retire with numbers across the board as great as anybody since Babe Ruth has had. The Yankees, bless their hearts, have him for six more years after this one."

Stupid Numbers as great as stupid Babe Ruth. Yawn.

But they're gritty or something.

I found a baseball columnist who is less talented than Wallace Matthews.

Critiquing this column is like shooting fish in a barrel.

I know why David Ortiz missed Kevin Gregg's face, by the way. Gregg just made his face look like a curveball.

In 1999, David Ortiz was 0-for-20 with 12 strikeouts.

I'll bet one of my toenails that David Ortiz met a li'l helper named P.E.D. sometime between his .000 performance in 1999 and his 139 RBIs in 2004:

"In the four years before A-Rod became a Yankee, including the years when he says he was juicing in Texas, he averaged just about 50 home runs a year.

Five-oh."

Five-oh, yo, five-oh!

Lights flashing behind him / But they scared of Lupica, so they mace him to blind him

"In his first four years with the Yankees, he averaged 43."

Right, and the whole time, you basically said ARod wasn't any good.

"If he hits the same 30 this year he has hit the last two, he will have averaged 31 home runs for his second four-year term with our kids from the Bronx.

Stop me if you see a trend here."

I absolutely see a trend. A hackneyed and stupid sportswriter once again endlessly praises the Red Sox and Mets while pointlessly ripping the Yankees.

Another trend is a player with 30 HRs and 100 RBIs for 13 straight season. Even better than Cody Ransom.


"All those who acted as if the earth would stop spinning properly if the Yankees didn't hit David Ortiz must have gotten giddy when they saw the highlights of Papi duking it out with Kevin Gregg of the Orioles late Friday night."

If you change "duking it out" to "swinging and missing," I thought the highlights were mildly amusing.

I also thought Gregg had a point. Ortiz is walking towards the mound when he wasn't even hit by a pitch.


But, for the most part, Yankee fans are understandably disinterested.

The Orioles baseball team is located in Baltimore and the Yankees baseball team is located in New York. The New York Daily News caters to fans of the New York Yankees, all three entities brought together due to proximity.

Yankee fans are rooting for Baltimore to beat Boston. That's because Boston in in first place and Baltimore is in fifth place.

Other than that, Yankee fans have no particular reason to be "giddy" when a Baltimore pitcher gets into an argument with a Boston DH.

If you had to choose Dennis Rasmussen or Jeff Kent, but Kent had to bat left-handed, and the games were played underwater, which would you choose?

"And that makes for an intriguing question: if you could choose one or the other to put on your team for the rest of his career, which would it be, the Mets' shortstop - who had to leave Saturday's game after two innings his left hamstring tightness - or the Yankees' second baseman?"
That is not an intriguing question.

It's a moot question and a very dumb question.

But, if we're talking about right now ... as in July 3rd, 2011 ... I'll take the player who is not injured.

No Go, Nova.

"And still I think he's the one getting kicked to the curb to make room for Phil Hughes.

It doesn't seem fair, especially after Nova earned his eighth win of the season as the Yankees reminded the Mets which team in New York is the hottest, defeating their crosstown rivals, 5-1, Friday night.

But, in truth, there's no easy call for the Yankees to make as they suddenly find themselves with a surplus of starting pitching.

It's a nice problem to have, and it's about the only problem the Yankees have these days.

Still, with Bartolo Colon rejoining the Yankees' starting rotation Saturday and Hughes waiting in the wings, Nova may well have felt like he was pitching Friday night to keep his spot."

Aldo should definitely keep his spot in the rotation. I don't know if Garcia has options to the minors, but it's either that or the bullpen. The benefits of choosing the young player are obvious.

Mike Lupica harbors a mystical love for David Ortiz. It's the only explanation.

I am pro-DH, probably largely because I'm a fan of an AL team. I can make a strong case that the NL should adopt the DH. Lupica simply seems angry that the Sox lost two out of three to Philly:

"This has to be the last season in which this system is allowed to exist in baseball, because the out-of-date rules about the DH now affect the integrity of the season and the schedule more than all the interleague baseball does. Your team is supposed to be your team."

Has to be?

Or what?

California will slide into the ocean?


"Before interleague play, the use, or non-use, of the DH only came into play in the World Series."

Regular season interleague play started in 1997. Fifteen years ago.


"For a long time, that seemed to be a bit of a novelty, teams only employing the DH in the American League park for two or three or four games in October. Only now there are all these interleague games every season. Why? Because baseball gets a spike in attendance out of them, that's why. I get it. This is about business."

Ummm ... why should the NL adopt the DH?


"And if there are two teams added to the playoffs, that will be about business, too."

Well, since you're the decider, why don't you tell us if two teams will be added to the playoffs?


"But this is about the business of baseball today, and I don't care what the records say about how the American League usually does against the National League in interleague baseball."

AL teams typically pound NL teams.

Still not sure what that has to do with anything.

Still not sure why you think the NL should adopt the DH.


"The simpler solution is to give everybody the DH, have everybody play the same rules the American League has been playing for years, no harm, no foul, we move on."

You, sir, are a dope.


"This has to be the last year where someone like Vlad Guerrero of the Orioles has to basically take a furlough from being a regular player when the Orioles play interleague ball in a National League park. Or David Ortiz of the Red Sox, the second-most important hitter on a team that thinks it has a chance to win the AL East and maybe the World Series this year, has a great season disrupted and not because of injury or a slump, because of the rules."

Again with the "has to be."


But this is really about David Ortiz, isn't it?

Lupica has a diary on his bedside table and he logs the at-bats of David Ortiz every day. When David Ortiz has zero hits, Lupica can't maintain an erection and the tension builds in the Lupica household. For this reason, Lupica has a sudden personal interest in the consequences of interleague play.

I apologize for being so vulgar, but it's the only plausible explanation.

It also partially explains why Lupica loves to refer to David Ortiz as "Big Papi."


"To get Ortiz back in the batting order the other night against the Phillies, Adrian Gonzalez - who IS the Red Sox's best hitter - had to go play rightfield for the second time in his career."

Lupica is completely nuts.


Adrian Gonzalez didn't have to play rightfield. They didn't have to get Ortiz back in the lineup.

It's maybe ironic that John Lackey had the only RBI for the Red Sox in that particular game?

I'm not really understanding what Lupica is getting at.


After 17 years of regular season interleague play ... after 40 years of the DH ... did Lupica just figure out that the AL teams often have to bench one of their big bats when they plan in NL parks?

More to the point, it's unclear to me why this particular incident stands out as the straw that broke the camel's back.

I mean, the Yankees benched the MVP in the 2009 World Series.


"Did the Red Sox lose two of three to the lowly San Diego Padres at home using the DH last week? You bet they did. Then they lost two of three to the Pirates in Pittsburgh and used Ortiz solely as a pinch-hitter. So maybe they would have lost those two of three anyway. But they should not have had to try. This is a system that has gone on for far too long and needs to be changed now, and the only way it gets changed is if everybody who loves baseball starts to make some noise about it."

Wow.

The beloved Red Sox had a bad week and Lupica wants to change the rules of baseball.

I mean, that's exactly what's happening in this man's mind.


"By the way? The Yankees would feel the same way about this if Alex Rodriguez were their full-time DH. But A-Rod is still a full-time position player at third base, at least for now, and this has been a season when a lot of guys have DH-ed for the Yankees. That isn't a team constructed around interleague play, that is just the way the Yankees have been constructed, period."

Remember when Lupica said ARod was going to move to CF or 1B? Still hasn't happened. Yeah, Lupica is really a dope.


By the way? [sic] Just exactly how do "the Yankees" feel about this? I haven't heard anyone from "the Yankees" give an opinion. But I'm sure "the Yankees" want to play their DH in NL parks. So Lupica's assertion is downright bizarre.

Jorge Posada is the Yankees' DH.

Jorge Posada hit .391 in June.

Why would the Yankees prefer to send Freddy Garcia to the plate instead of Jorge Posada?


"They are surely going to add a couple of teams to the playoffs and they might cut the schedule down from 162 games, and might move a team to the American League so we have leagues of 15 and 15, and go ahead and try to figure how interleague baseball is going to work with THAT."

It's a bad idea, but you still haven't explained why the NL should adopt the DH.


"I will give them all of that. But they have to give me something back. They've got to give me one set of rules for all of baseball, once and for all."

I know the "have tos" and the "give mes" sound like literary license.

But Lupica might be truly delusional. A Yankee-hating, Mets-and-Red-Sox-loving psychopath who thinks he's important because he once talked to Joe Torre.

After reading this self-absorbed nonsense, I really think Lupica may have lost his mind.

Lupica thinks the commissioner of baseball is asking him for his opinion.

Lupica thinks he's the commissioner of baseball.

Lupica thinks "the Yankees" are anti-DH because "the Yankees" were monitoring the Boston/Philly series and diabolically grinning when Adrian Gonzalez had to play one whole game in right field.

Lupica thinks the last 100 years of NL rules were a conspiracy to force Adrian Gonzalez to play one whole game in right field. A Yankee/NL/Bud Selig conspiracy which hands the AL East to the Evil Yankees.

The anti-Mondesi.

For his career, Francisco Cervelli has batted .236 with the bases empty.

For his career, Francisco Cervellia has batted .383 with two outs and runners in scoring position.

My bad.

For the first time in my life, I briefly listened to Mike Lupica's radio show.


The initial attempt at humor was, "When I heard Jack McKeon was hired by the Marlins, my first thought was whether he got treatments at Bartolo Colon's Dominican doctor."

Implying with humorless humor that Colon's comeback is suspect and due to a treatment outside the purview of American laws.


Within five minutes, Lupica was claiming the Red Sox would beat the Yankees in the ALCS because the Yankees don't have Andy Pettitte anymore.

Mind you, this is June 21, 2011 and we're talking about Andy Pettitte and a fictional 2011 ALCS.


But, you know ... while Lupica is continually mocking the age of the Yankee players (such as Colon), he also criticizes the Yankees losing Pettitte, Matsui, and especially Damon ... though that criticism has died down as Granderson and Gardner have excelled in the plate, on the basepaths, and particularly in the field.

On the other hand, Lupica mocks the play of the youngsters on the Yankees, such as Nunez.

The narrative is that the Yankees have a deficient farm system.

So this narrative necessitates the dismissal of the contributions from Joba, Hughes, Robertson, Nova, Gardner, Cervelli, and even Cano.

The Yankees have nine guys in their bullpen with ERAs under 3.00. This is based on limited innings, of course, and ERA is not the be-all and end-all of pitching stats in general and reliever stats in particular.

But if Lupica is willing to pronounce Chris Young as the Mets' best pitcher after 20 innings, you'd think he'd notice the stellar performances across the board of the AAA Yankees.


Which is just a longwinded way of saying that Lupica is a hypocrite in various mediums.

That didn't last long.

Mets are stale:

"This day curdled early for the Mets - in the second inning, to be precise. That was when Jon Niese's recent stretch of dominance ended, and the Mets effectively fell to two games below .500. Now we ask: When does this dance with respectability cease to be interesting?

...

But their dead-energy 7-3 loss to the Los Angeles Angels Sunday, which clinched a series defeat against a team stuffed with overpriced veterans and who-is-that-guy youngsters, offered a peek at the darker underbelly of where this could go.

Despite playing sharp baseball of late, the Mets are 10-7 in their last 17 games: Good, but not enough to muscle out of a losing record. The pattern has been, lose one, win three. Lose one, win two, lose one. Not sunk, but hardly soaring. And beginning to grow a tad stale."

They're the Rebecca Black of MLB.


Which actually got me thinking: Are the writers who cover MLB out of tune with the pacing of the game?

In the Internet meme / twitter / facebook age, is a 162-game baseball season filled with 3-hour games simply unable to keep their attention?

Does this explain why they're picking MVPs after two weeks and making up nonsense like "Power Ratings" and praising the Mets when they have a good week just to ridicule the Mets when they have a bad weekend?


"A clear-eyed look at Sunday's product could produce no other analysis: This team needs to be a bit better, if it wants to hold our attention."

Okay.

You're the sportswriter who's writing about the Mets.

I'm kind of embarrassed that I bothered reading the article about such a lame subject matter. I'll be sure to read the funny papers next time.


I don't necessarily think it's preferable to offer the Mets false praise ... which, actually, seems to be the typical tone for a $100-million team that's playing .500 ... Collins for Manager of the Year and such ...

I just don't understand why so many baseball columnists seem to dislike baseball so much.


Also, are the Angels really just a team of overpriced veterans and who-is-that-guy youngsters? If you're a baseball writer, why don't you explain to us who-is-that-guy>

The walk-off balk was compelling.

Another writer answering the question nobody was asking. Another baseball writer who's bored by a baseball team playing baseball:

"This was the backdrop to a get-away day game that would count in the standings but hardly seemed to matter in the grand scheme. By the time Brett Gardner’s broken-bat single in the 12th inning gave the Yankees a 3-2 walk-off victory, many of the 47,487 fans had already departed, but another regular-season game was crossed off the calendar.

And, for just a second, you could not help but think about the Mets coming home to play at Citi Field tonight, and how in the last two weeks theirs has become the more dramatic of the two local baseball stories."

Yesterday's Yankee win had about a dozen compelling storylines if you care about that sort of thing.

Sweeping the reigning AL champs; the converted outfielder starting pitcher guy; the Yankee bullpen pitchers with ERAs under 2.00; ARod not playing; Teixeira/Granderson HR race; a walk-off win; etc.

"Ever since June 2, when they trailed the Pirates 7-0 before coming from behind to win, 9-8, Terry Collins’ Mets have been playing for their lives and become much more compelling to watch than the Yankees. Derek Jeter going on the disabled list Tuesday and taking his march to 3,000 hits off the schedule for a couple of weeks only served to accentuate the point. The Yankees are the Yankees for a reason. Over the course of a six-month season, everyone knows they’ll be fine.

Not even losing eight of nine to the hated Red Sox could create much of a sense of urgency at the Stadium. Boston started the season 2-10 and now have the best record in the American League. The Yankees had a six-game skid in May and are right on Boston’s heels. Who doesn’t think they’ll separate from the rest of the American League by August? Gordon getting the start was more a curiosity than a cause for concern. The Yankees didn’t need the game."

Okay, so pay attention to the Mets. I'm a Yankee fan, so I'll pay attention to the Yankees. I hope you don't run out of Mets storylines.

By the way, there's no rule that says you can't pay attention to both teams.

I guess Dancing With the Stars must be a really, really, really, really good show.

What is more predictable?

A Mike Lupica article in which he mentions Dancing With The Stars or a Mike Lupica article in which he favors the Mets over the Yankees?:

"We talk and talk about shortstops this season in New York the way they once talked about Willie and Mickey and the Duke, though the conversation about them was mostly good. You really can't say the same about Jose Reyes and Derek Jeter, even if Reyes is the best player in town."

Wrong.

Jason Bay is the best player "in town."


The rest is comparing a 28-year-old baseball player to a 37-year-old baseball player.

If that intrigues you ... (spoiler alert: Lupica concludes that Reyes is better than Jeter and Lupica also uses the adjective "fast" to describe various things and, since Reyes is "fast," this somehow ingeniously links all of these things) ... please feel free to read the rest of the article.

I think it's kind of, well, lame to compare a 28-year-old athlete to a 37-year-old athlete.

Somebody, somewhere ask why Jeter didn't try to score on a fly ball in the first inning.

Yankees end up losing 1-0, fall to 7-11 in one-run games, and fall 2.5 games behind the Red Sox. The run was there for the taking, yet Jeter seemed unwilling to take it. A mental gaffe or lack of effort typical of the 2011 Yankees:

"Oh, by the way, the Yankees were blanked, 1-0, by the Indians as Asdrubal Cabrera's fourth-inning RBI single off A.J. Burnett stood up as the game's only run.

But enough about that. After a sweep at the hands of the Red Sox and three straight wins over the Tribe, this home stand has been all about Jeter and his pursuit of No. 3,000."

By the way, a baseball game was played.

Yawn.

Baseball is boring, isn't it?

Joe Girardi gets goes toe-to-toe with Manny Acta.

The question is, did Terry Francona give Girardi permission to act this way?:

"Yankees manager Joe Girardi was red in the face with anger, nose-to-nose in a screaming match with Cleveland counterpart Manny Acta after Mark Teixeira was whacked with a fastball.

Tired of getting hit by pitches - and losing to rival Boston - the fired-up Yankees took out their frustration on the skidding Cleveland Indians .

Alex Rodriguez hit a colossal home run, Curtis Granderson also connected and New York got back on track with an 11-7 victory Friday night in a game that quickly grew testy.

'Sometimes it doesn't really matter if it's on purpose,' Rodriguez said. 'There's no question, it was very important for us to bounce back and play our type of baseball.'

Girardi and Acta got into a heated argument when both benches and bullpens emptied after Teixeira was hit behind the shoulder by a second-inning pitch from struggling Cleveland starter Fausto Carmona .

No punches were thrown and there appeared to be little pushing and shoving - if any. Plate umpire Dale Scott issued warnings to both teams, and there was no further trouble.

'I have respect for Manny. I actually had a nice exchange with Manny at 3 o'clock today. But that doesn't mean there's not some feistiness in me and when my guys are getting plunked, I'm going to protect them,' said Girardi, who gestured angrily at Carmona on the field. 'I told him I thought he did it on purpose and I didn't like it.' "

So you got beaten up by your big brother Red Sox and you took it out by kicking the dog Indians.

The Yankees need to trade for some Boston Bruins players.

"David Ortiz on Wednesday night had a message for New York Yankees manager Joe Girardi, who had said he didn't care for the way the Boston Red Sox slugger had flipped his bat after hitting a home run Tuesday: 'Take it like a man.'

...

For his part, Girardi also downplayed his comment, suggesting before Wednesday's game that the media had given it a 'Full Monty' treatment he hadn't intended. Nor did he believe Red Sox left-hander Jon Lester hitting two Yankees batters Tuesday night -- Mark Teixeira and Russell Martin -- was an invitation for the Yankees to engage in any retaliatory target practice.

'I didn't hear our guys talk about it at all,' Girardi said. 'It seems like it's been talked about more in the media than our guys. I didn't hear anything about our guys being upset.' "

I'm upset.

Hey, Yankee fans, are you upset?

Because I'm upset.

Nice to know that Girardi is not upset and none of his guys are upset.

Makes me feel like I'm more emotionally invested than the manager and the players.

Makes me feel like, if I was playing second base for the Yankees, and the catcher threw the ball poorly to second base, and I was backing up second base, that I'd stick my arm out and try to keep the ball from going into centerfield.

Make me feel like, if I was managing the Yankees and Ortiz challenged my manhood, I might instruct my pitcher to drill him.

What were you expecting?

Derek Jeter has 1 career grand slam and 241 career GIDP. I realize that not all 241 GIDP occurred with the bases loaded, but he also has more career GIDP than career homeruns.


You were expecting a Time Warp Big Hit from the Cap'n?

It's like expecting a bird to swim.

It's like expecting a fish to fly.

It's like expecting A.J. Burnett to pitch well in a big game.

Under .500 in one-run games.

I don't trust Burnett and I don't trust this team to win a so-called big game.

The only "retaliation" against Ortiz is to win, but this team and this pitcher have a tendency in 2011 to come up small.