Monday, April 04, 2005

Jon Heyman goes schizo on Boomer.

David Wells is a "tubby nightlife lover" and a "Babe Ruth wanna-be."

Sounds like a bad fit for a team that's going to win the World Series because of their character.

Just yesterday, Wells wasn't a "tubby nightlife lover," he was just "one new bona fide idiot, Wells, joining the craziness for added spice."

Wells is probably moping in the locker room, pulling at the petals of a flower: "Heyman loves me, he loves me not. Heyman loves me, he loves me not."

Who can blame Boomer if he's confused? Jon Heyman is a complicated man who can change his mind like the wind changes direction, like the tide changes its intensity. Jon Heyman's insights are as piercing and fickle as Cupid's arrow.

No matter. Any man who can cite Character as the reason the Yankees will fail to win the World Series ... and then go right ahead and pick the Red Sox ... well, his opinion is not too convincing.

I'm sure Damon is focused on the Common Goal while he's not writing a book or making appearances in Jimmy Fallon movies. Yup, they're dirtdogs, alright.

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